Slapdash Thoughts

Market to Market 86-Mile Relay

2008-10-13T20:33:00.002-05:00

On Saturday, October 11th, I ran an 86-mile relay from Omaha's Downtown "Old Market," to Lincoln's Downtown "Haymarket Square," which lies across the street from the Nebraska Cornhuskers football stadium. It was the first year for this race, and it was awesome!

The race started at 7:00 am, and there were 150 different teams running. Each team had 6, 7, or 8 runners. There were 8 members on my team, 6 boys and 2 girls, and we each had to run in order from Runner 1 to Runner 8, doing three legs each. Also, each leg we ran was a different length; mine were 3.23 miles, 4.63 miles, and 4.10 miles, totaling 12 miles. Each person on the team had pretty much the same mileage, overall. It wouldn't have been so hard, but try running as fast as you can for 3.23 miles, and then running again about an hour or so later, and just as hard as before, and then doing it again! It was tough!

Our team finished first, with an overall time of 8 hours 40 minutes. That is a 6:03 average pace. Again, we started at 7:00 am, and finished at 3:40 pm. I can't believe we did it! We were extremely exhausted, but it was so, so much fun. And because we won overall, we get a free entry into next year's race.

I am putting a link on here for you all to see, courtesy of one of the guys on my team. He's a great photographer. He captured some great moments. See for yourself.

Race

They will be having this relay every year, and I have ABSOLUTELY no complaints. This was the most organized race I’ve ever been a part of, seriously, and this was only the first year! Volunteers to the MAX. There were volunteers along the course to make sure you didn’t turn down the wrong road. Everyone should make it to this event some year. It’s great.

Lastly, I was able to get the time for my splits, but the first leg is not accurate. I forgot to start my garmin, so I ran 0.22 miles before I remembered to turn it on. So what I do have is this:

Stage 3 – 3.01 miles (I actually ran 3.23 miles) in 19:46, 6:35 pace, mostly neighborhood/asphalt
Stage 11 – 4.76 miles in 31:55, 6:43 pace, went from loose gravel, to dirt, to limestone trail, to sidewalk, and finally to asphalt
Stage 19 – 4.19 miles in 27:35, 6:35 pace, limestone trail

If you check out these stages on the website I listed, you’ll see that the first two legs were listed as moderate/hard. They WERE. They were extremely hilly, and they were both straight into the wind, which was blowing a good 20 miles an hour. The day started out windy and about 50 degrees, and at 2:30 pm or so, when I ran my last leg, it was still windy and had reached 75 degrees.

This was a great event, and the post-race shindig, as they called it, was excellent, as well. I would recommend this race to anyone who loves to give something their complete and total all. It was a long day (woke up at 4:00 am and went to bed at 12:30 am), but it was worth it. Definitely a great time.

Eggciting!!!

2008-10-06T17:54:00.005-05:00

How exciting! I looked outside today and all three birds were back (they come and go and I always wonder if they will be back). They were hanging out, meandering about, looking like they were just shooting the shit.

They left just a few minutes ago, so I stole the chance to look out in their little bowl. Of note: they are forever backing their butts up into the corner of the wall, behind the bowl, and I could not figure out, for the life of me, what they were doing--until today. Seems as though we do have an egg!

Lazy Sunday Afternoon...

2008-10-05T17:22:00.002-05:00

Well, I've seen them coming and going, but no real activity to speak of. I know at one point I saw them casually playing around with one another, all three? of them...it seems as though the female actually has managed to keep the two male suitors at hand, and it appears as they are willing to stick around and share the responsibility. I guess the kid will grow up knowing "my two dads," rather than just the one. Well, anyway, here is a photo of two of the three lovers hanging out on a lazy Sunday afternoon...

Birds Mating

2008-10-04T18:24:00.003-05:00

I looked out there today, and there were three birds out on the balcony. Two males, and the female from yesterday. I think they are vying for her attention. I took some photos of them doing their mating ritual, I guess is what they're doing. I tried to get one of the male when he was on top of the female. I read up on that, and it appears as though the male does that to ejaculate into the female "cloacal," which is open at just the right time for mating. It only takes a minute for the semen to be inserted, according to what I read.

Bird Love

2008-10-03T18:06:00.001-05:00

So about a month ago, we noticed a couple of pigeons seemed to be nesting out on our balcony. They went through several weeks of taking turns sitting on the egg while the other one left for food, keeping watch over the egg to make sure no one harmed it, etc. Then one day the little egg hatched a little birdling.

We were able to watch the birdling grow up, staying in the nest at all times while its parents were out gathering food, flying around, and who knows what else.

I knew one day the little birdling would leave the nest. It got huge! After about 30 days I looked out the window and the little bird was gone! I thought he might come back to rest that night, but we never saw him again. That was about 5 days ago.

We have new visitors. I have decided to keep track of their progress, daily, by taking photos of them during the day. Today I noticed two birds out there kind of nesting, so I took a photo of them, shown below. I think the grey bird is the female, and the other one is the male. The female is considerably smaller. I also took a photo of the nest after they left--they must have just gone out for a date or something. :)

I will continue to show the progress every day until the little birdling has flown the coop!

Market to Market Relay

2008-10-02T08:37:00.001-05:00

I got some great news late last night.

There is a new relay this year (October 11) in Omaha--86 miles from Omaha to Lincoln. It's already sold out! They only allowed 150 teams to compete. Teams are allowed from 6 to 8 people per team. If the members on your team have qualifying 5k times (under 19:00), your team can be registered as elite.

Last night I got a text message from a girl who is the captain of one of the elite teams (there are only about 6 elite teams). One of her members is not able to compete, so she asked if I would like to be on their team. The girl who asked me is a 3-time Olympic Trials qualifier, and although I know her and visited her once this summer for my ITBS injury (she's a Physical Therapist), I've never run with her.

This is going to be awesome!

Me in Green.

2008-10-02T08:00:00.004-05:00

Omaha Marathon - For Mom

2008-09-28T19:44:00.005-05:00

This was a day in memory.

A year ago today my mom passed away. I know how proud she was last year (September 23, 2007) when I won--it gave her something to focus on for the remaining 5 days of her life. I knew that she would be proud if I ran the race again, but I didn’t officially decide to run it until Saturday, September 27th, at 1:00 pm. HA!

Phillip and I went to the expo to pick up his race packet for the half, and I decided to go ahead and give the marathon a shot. This coming off of no training, except for a few 17 milers over the last 2 months.

We had perfect weather this morning: clear and no wind; race start was about 56 degrees out, race end was near 75 or so. Exactly the same as last year.

I didn’t even know what to expect. It wasn’t supposed to matter—this race was for my mom, and the goal was to finish and do it in her memory. When I started the race at 7:00 am this morning, I did not feel prepared at all. I was in the bathroom when the gun went off, mainly because the race director does NOT place enough POJ’s out for this race. It’s ridiculous. Anyway, I finished up, ran out, and jumped in the crowd. By this time I was behind the 4:15 pacer!!! There were so many people around I thought I would never make it through the first mile in a decent time. As it was I missed the first mile marker. I was only wearing my Timex, so I don’t have the first mile split. I do have the 2nd mile, though.

Miles 1 & 2 - 15:17

So do with that what you will. At this time I was just running along, thinking about what in the hell I thought I was doing just running a marathon on a whim. But I kept going, and tried to each mile a 7:53 mile. It wasn’t really working out that way.

Mile 3 – 7:23

I missed the fourth mile split, also, but I have the 5th mile.

Miles 4 & 5 - 14:53

After mile 5 I have all my splits, so I’ll list them here. You can see that my splits are all over the place—this is due to me trying to force myself to slow down.

Mile 6 – 7:25
Mile 7 – 7:34
Mile 8 – 7:48 (fairly long, massive hill)
Mile 9 – 7:27
Mile 10 – 7:40
Mile 11 – 7:43
Mile 12 – 7:51 (another long, steeper hill)
Mile 13 – 7:36
Mile 14 – 7:46
Mile 15 – 7:26
Mile 16 – 7:42
Mile 17 – 7:38
Mile 18 – 7:34
Mile 19 – 7:29
Mile 20 – 7:38
Mile 21 – 6:56 (I think this mile was short, and the next was long)
Mile 22 – 8:00
Mile 23 – 7:25
Mile 24 – 7:18
Mile 25 – 7:21
Mile 26 – 7:24
Mile .2 – 1:32

I never really had any trouble, just that the only Gu was at mile 18—but that wasn’t the problem. I knew it would be that way because that’s the way it was last year. The problem is they only had Raspberry. YUK. Last year they had a variety, and I got Chocolate Mocha. YUM. Anyway, that’s the only sort of fuel I had, besides water sips at 3 different tables throughout the race.

The entire race I had no idea of my time, place, or anything. I didn’t really care. I wasn’t ever passed, and at mile 24 or so I passed another woman who sounded like she was having an asthma attack.

When I got to the finish line my clock time was 3:18:58. I knew it would be a little different than that because of the chip. It was. After what seemed endless amounts of time, they posted results on the side of a trailer—

3:17:46 (last year was 3:22:40)
7:33 average pace
4/152 women
37/429 finishers
1/27 age group (30-35)

I’m neither disappointed nor upset with any of this. I totally didn’t expect anything going into this race because, well, I didn’t train. Here are some photos of Phillip and I after the race.

naDDy

2008-08-30T17:23:00.001-05:00

The naDDy is a running route that one member of the Omaha running community runs every day, nearly. The name of the route is something he originated, and the reason speaks for itself: the route sucks balls.

I ran with my new running friend, and the way the course is laid out you can do any variety of different runs on these roads, and they are all TOUGH if (and I know they are) they are anything like the one we ran today. Crap people. This was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY worse than Boston will ever even think about being. I made it through though, and the way we went today, it ended up being only 17 miles, not 18, which was fine with me. 17 miles isn't a sneeze out there, and you'll be able to notice that from my paces, seriously.

Okay, for those of you who know me pretty well, you know my pace tends to ride up when I run outside. Here are my splits:

Mile 1 - 8:12
Mile 2 - 7:58
Mile 3 - 8:05
Mile 4 - 7:52
Mile 5 - 7:30
Mile 6 - 7:39
Mile 7 - 7:44
Mile 8 - 7:42
Mile 9 - 7:53
Mile 10 - 7:49
Mile 11 - 8:08
Mile 12 - 7:45
Mile 13 - 7:47
Mile 14 - 7:42
Mile 15 - 7:59
Mile 16 - 7:52
Mile 17 - 8:01
Mile .01 - :03 (5:00)

Total - 17.01 miles, 2:13:48, 7:52 average pace

Now, I like to think I'm a fast(ish) runner. That was freaking ridiculously hard. I would challenge any of you, if you come to Omaha, to run out there, if you dare.

And finally, the course itself--

Wabash

2008-08-26T11:02:00.003-05:00

So two days ago, Sunday, August 24th, Phillip and I drove out to a mostly shaded, 63-mile limestone biking/running/xc skiing/horse riding?/walking trail that runs from Iowa into Missouri. I had heard that it was great to run on, very soft and forgiving, easy on the legs. And one of the team members runs there every Sunday morning for his long runs because of the shade factor. I couldn't wait. I had planned on running for 2 hours.

Let me just point out that last week my mileage was pretty good, considering I'm still building--

Sunday - ran 10.1 miles (I'm starting with Sunday because that was the first day of traveling to Dallas)
Monday - elliptical for an hour, ran 4 miles
Tuesday - rest day (class from 8:00 am to 9:30 pm straight)
Wednesday - ran 12.66 miles
Thursday - ran 10.1 miles
Friday - ran 11.36 miles
Saturday - rest day (travel back to Omaha)
Sunday - had planned on 15? maybe? I had no clue.

Anyway, I know I'm just getting around to this, but I guess it's better late than never. That trail was fantastic!!! I'm going to post an elevation map and my mile splits here in a second.

My plan going out was to run out for an hour, turn around, and run back in for an hour. No real goal at all. No pace goal, no mileage goal, nothing. I just know that I can typically run a little over 15 miles in 2 hours. So you can imagine my surprise when I returned.

200 feet isn't a big deal, but I think the layout is pretty cool.

Miles were as so:
1 - 7:47
2 - 7:39
3 - 7:39
4 - 7:39
5 - 7:39
6 - 7:37
7 - 7:23
8 - 7:11
9 - 7:20
10 - 7:19
11 - 7:08
12 - 7:03
13 - 6:56
14 - 6:56
15 - 7:06
16 - 7:05
.01 - :02 (7:32)

Total - 16.01 miles, 1:57:39, 7:21 average pace

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

Schlep Bag

2008-08-17T18:36:00.004-05:00

Almost forgot!! I took a sewing class last Wednesday, and learned how to sew a bag! It was a first for me--never have sewn before, ever!

Here are the pictures:

Cooper Institute

2008-08-17T18:27:00.002-05:00

So I'm sitting here in my hotel room in Dallas--what I'm waiting for, I'm not sure. I really don't know what to expect from the next few days. I am here for a Personal Training class at the famous Cooper Institute, which features four days of in-class training, CPR certification, and a final exam on Friday from 9:00 am to 12:00 pm. I won't be flying out, though, until Saturday because there were no other options on dumb Southwest. I had to wait until then to get a decent flight at a decent time for a decent price. I MISS PHILLIP!!

I left early this morning and arrived here at 10:30 am, after which I immediately found my rental car, drove said rental car to the hotel, then went to the grocery store to purchase food for the next few days. It's nice; since I have a suite at the Residence Inn, I can buy food and have room to store it in the full-size refrigerator here. Normally I have nowhere to store my ice cream. ;)

Anyway, I am really anxious about the next few days. I have no idea what to expect. I don't know if I am cut out for this, seriously. I feel so out of my element, though this is probably the one topic with which I'm most familiar. I don't know; I guess I'm just not confident enough. Typical.

More to come on this later. I don't know when I'll be able to post, much less run, as the days are from 8:00 to 5:00, and that's quite a long four days of continuous learning.

Crazy the way the mind works.

2008-08-16T18:32:00.003-05:00

Quick post here before the Women's Olympic marathon--

I did a double today.

Elliptical - 12.42 miles, 66 minutes, 5:18 average pace

Then, weirdly, I wanted to run outside...I'm becoming hooked, and I'm getting a nice tan since I run so late in the afternoon. It has been around 80 the last few days I've run out there.

Anyway...I tried, very hard dammit, to keep it slower today.

Splits:
Mile 1 - 7:45
Mile 2 - 7:43
Mile 3 - 7:36
Mile 4 - 7:36
Mile 5 - 7:35
Mile 6 - 7:35
Mile 7 - 7:35
Mile 8 - 7:27
Mile 9 - 7:30
Mile .21 - 1:34 (7:32)

9.21 miles, 1:10:02, 7:36 pace

Now, off to the races!

Progressively...

2008-08-15T16:23:00.000-05:00

Off work today, so I got out for an early run with Phillip. I decided that I should try running with him, mostly so that I could motivate him for his scheduled 60 minute run. I should have stayed with him, but after about half a mile (or less) I just couldn't do it. I just cannot force myself to run a 9:30 pace. I get impatient.

Anyway, so off I went, running my own race. Went along, not even paying attention to my garmin, just running by feel. I was planning on 8 miles, but after mile 4 I was feeling so good I decided to make it 10. After 5 miles I turned around and made my way back to the house, but noticed at mile 10 that I had run pretty progressively, so decided to do a slower 11th mile. Looked at my data and uh...

Mile 1 - 8:30
Mile 2 - 7:47
Mile 3 - 7:32
Mile 4 - 7:33
Mile 5 - 7:25
Mile 6 - 7:23
Mile 7 - 7:22
Mile 8 - 7:13
Mile 9 - 7:06
Mile 10 - 7:01
Mile 11 - 7:24
Mile .16 - 1:09 (7:12)

Total - 11.16 miles, 1:23:31, 7:29 average pace

Fast times at Northern Natural.

2008-08-11T15:31:00.001-05:00

I decided to run again today (fourth day in a row), even after telling Phillip upon leaving the house this morning that I was taking the day off. HA! Yeah, right. Anyway, it was special being the fourth day because I haven't run more than 2 days in a row since I was hurt.

And freaking crap! Seriously, this is getting out of hand. I'm NOT running outside anymore. My theory is this: every time I get out on the road, track, sidewalk, street, etc. my body must think I'm running a race. I decided to try running outside today because, at the time, it was only 72 degrees and cloudy. It's humid, but it's alright. Not bad out.

Mile 1 - 7:37
Mile 2 - 7:33
Mile 3 - 7:21
Mile 4 - 7:02
Mile 5 - 7:11
Mile 0.11 - 0:44 (6:40)

Total outside -- 5.11 miles, 37:28, 7:20 average pace

After 5 miles, I gave up and went inside to run on the treadmill.

Total inside -- 3.14 miles, 25:00, 7:53 pace

I really need someone to run with if I'm going to run outside.

Why I Don't Run Outside Every Day...

2008-08-10T20:45:00.001-05:00

Today's run was normal -- on the treadmill. I ran 12.14 miles in 1:35:00, a 7:53 pace.

Yesterday, though, I went to the gym and did the elliptical for 1:06:00, and that's all I was going to do.

12.44 miles, 1:06:00, 5:18 average pace

Then, as I was heading home, I saw a girl outside our apartments running...I got the urge to run--but not just run, to do it outside. Seriously. This is the reason I stick to indoors, where I can KEEP THE PACE DOWN. I ran on the same trail I ran on Friday from work, only this time I started on the trail by our apartments, ran 4 miles out, then 4 miles back. The last .09 was when I noticed the sprinklers down the road at our apartments were going and I decided to run through them.

Mile 1 - 7:31
Mile 2 - 7:22
Mile 3 - 7:17
Mile 4 - 7:21
Mile 5 - 7:18
Mile 6 - 7:16
Mile 7 - 7:09
Mile 8 - 7:04
Mile .09 - 0:36

Total - 8.09 miles, 58:59, 7:17 average pace

No more running outside unless I can keep my pace down. Bad Tonya.

Out on the trail...

2008-08-08T20:16:00.002-05:00

I did something very spontaneous today for my run. I went out with a co-worker on the trail that runs from my office to, conveniently, our apartment complex. The distance is only around 3 miles out and 3 back, but the girl I was running with is only able to run about 4 miles at this point.

*She's working on it, though! Only 6 months ago she could barely run a mile, and just last month she decided she wanted to run a 5k. She said she was awarded 2nd in her age group, and I'm so glad for her!

Anyway, so we got about a mile and a half out and she became over-heated and had to stop and catch her breath (it was around 80, probably about 50% humidity). I kept going to 2 miles and turned around and ran back. She was at the office already, waiting on me, and she said she was sorry and that she would definitely be up for it again. I don't know if she was overheated from the sun or from running my pace. Either way, at least she wasn't discouraged!

Outbound - 2 miles, 15:46, 7:53 average pace
Inbound (me by myself) - 2.02 miles, 14:07, 7:00 average pace (I have no idea how that happened)
Total - 4.02 miles, 29:53, 7:27 average pace

I then went inside and ran 4.43 miles on the treadmill at a 7:53 pace, for 35:00.

Total overall - 8.45 miles, 64:53, 7:40 average pace

In all, a very nice run today. I also did an hour on the arc trainer after work.

Better than ever!

2008-08-03T20:03:00.005-05:00

Running is going so much better. I'm coming back, I think. Since I wrote the last blog, I have run and cross trained six out of ten days. The remaining four days consisted of three days of cross training, and one day of rest. Those six days of running were even better because three of them were at my regular easy pace, one was at recovery, and two were progressive, going way beyond my easy pace. I mean, WAY beyond. Especially today.

Today's run went something like this:

5 min @ 8:34
5 min @ 8:20
5 min @ 8:06
5 min @ 7:54
5 min @ 7:42
5 min @ 7:30
5 min @ 7:19
5 min @ 7:09
5 min @ 6:59
5 min @ 6:49
5 min @ 6:40
5 min @ 6:31
5 min @ 6:23 (Olympic Trials qualifying pace)
6 min 15 sec @ 6:15
3 min 45 sec @ 6:23 (Again, if I could run this pace for 26.2, I would be the happiest person alive. Ever.)
5 min @ 6:31
5 min @ 6:40
5 min @ 6:49
5 min @ 6:59
5 min @ 7:09
5 min @ 7:19
5 min @ 7:30
5 min @ 7:42
5 min @ 7:54
5 min @ 8:06

Total: 17.35 miles, 2:05:00, 7:17 average pace

This run today gives me a total of 43 miles this week, definitely different from the last few weeks. The last time I ran this many miles in one week was the week after Mother's Day...when all this crap started. I mean, look at my last 2 months of running, starting May 19, by week--

19.2
19.2
9.2
1.3
10.6
11.3
5.6
28.6
28.1
36.7
and this week, 43.1

Pretty terrible, considering I was running at least 50 miles a week every single week for 3 years. :(

Anyway, hopefully that's all behind me now. I'm going to take it easy, do whatever I want, until I officially decide I want to race something. I don't know when that will be, but I just want to enjoy running again before I commit to something.

Team Nebraska Brooks

2008-07-24T10:17:00.003-05:00

I forgot to mention in yesterday's post that I'm now a part of Team Nebraska Brooks' website. For those of you who have been reading this blog from the start, back in January 2008, at the Chiller Challenge, I was asked to become a part of Team Nebraska Brooks. I accepted, and have been a member for the past 7 months. I haven't really been that active within the club, but they have provided support for a couple of races I have done over the past several months. Anyway, there is a new website up for our team, TeamNebraskaBrooks. Check me out, midway down the page.

I heard from my friend Dave this morning. He's doing well, already back at home recovering! THAT'S a strong man--just two days ago he was in surgery!

I also wanted to let you guys know that yesterday, when I said I was going to run, man did I ever! I ran at lunch, like usual, and after I started out with 15 minutes on the arc trainer, I ran the following:
1/2 mile @ 8:34 pace
1/2 mile @ 8:27
1/2 mile @ 8:20
1/2 mile @ 8:13
1/2 mile @ 8:06
1/2 mile @ 8:00
1/2 mile @ 7:54
1/2 mile @ 7:48
1/2 mile @ 7:42
1/2 mile @ 7:36
1/2 mile @ 7:30
1/2 mile @ 7:24
1/2 mile @ 7:19
1/2 mile @ 7:14
1/2 mile @ 7:09
1/2 mile @ 7:04
.39 mile @ 6:59

Total - 8.39 miles, 65:00, 7:44 average pace

I have to tell you, it ROCKED! But, How in the world, Who in the world, was forcing me to run that 6:59 pace in the Boston Marathon? I mean, seriously, that is not just a little jaunt in the park. However, there was a guy I knew that came into the fitness center just as I was finishing up, and I had no problem speaking to him. So I know my lungs are okay. I was running at that speed with no problem. I just don't remember being able to run that fast for 26.2 miles.

I finished up my day, after work, by doing the arc trainer for an hour.

Needless to say, after my Jaunt at lunch yesterday, plus an hour of arc trainer after work, plus the past 7 consecutive days of 2 hour+ workouts, including 7 days of arc trainer, 4 of those days including running, 3 of which were 8+ miles, and one which was 11+ miles, I'd say today consists of nada for me. Going to lunch with a coworker, but I will resume the workout that is my life tomorrow.

If any of you (if anyone reads this) would like to see my run/arc/elliptical/bike schedule, you can view it over on the left-hand side of the page under the title "Addiction." That box shown there with my workout totals in it should lead you directly to a calendar.

News and more...

2008-07-23T10:46:00.004-05:00

Okay, so I know it has been quite some time since I logged anything. There are a few reasons for that, as I will divulge into further in a moment. Right now I want to say that I've got my mind on my dear friend Dave, who is currently recovering from Degenerative Disk surgery in Chicago. I also want to point out that yesterday was my mother's birthday, and she would have been only 50.

So, on to other things.

On Mother's Day, Phillip and I went to his mother's house in Austin. I was still recovering (slightly) from the Boston Marathon, but there was a 5k that his little (9-year-old) sister wanted us to run with her. We knew she wouldn't be able to run the entire thing, so we weren't really concerned about a time.

We arrived in Austin on Friday, ran the 5k Saturday morning, and then made our way out to to a trail near his mom's house for some real running. The race was at 8:00 that morning and the sky was overcast, so by the time we made it to the trail it was just after 10:00 and it was already nearing 90 degrees. And HUMID.

Anyway, I ran 8 miles that day, and it was all I could do to get back in the car. Despite running the 8 at my normal pace, I was worn out from the heat (I don't know how people run in Austin, blech).

Needless to say, the next day (Sunday) I opted for the World Tennis Center that is mere blocks from my mother-in-law's house. Awesome. It was nice to run in air-conditioning--I ran another 8.

Here's the kicker, and I do mean kicker. We got ready to leave the next morning (Monday), and as I was approaching the railing to go downstairs, I stubbed my left pinky toe. Arrggghhh. It felt like I had broken it. Seriously. It turned black almost immediately, and the next few days the bruise seeped down into my foot. Ha! I wasn't about to let that keep me from running, however. The next day (Tuesday) at work I taped my pinky toe to the next toe and decided that would do it. It hurt for a little while, but wasn't really that bad. I thought it would be a simple little thing.

So let me see--the day after that (Wednesday) may have been the greatest mistake i've made so far this year. I ran at work over lunch, my typical 8 miles. When I got home that night Phillip decided he wanted to try running a tempo at my pace, and he wanted me to pace him. Okay, no big deal. It would be a mere 5 miles. That went fine.

Well, it did until we got back to the house and realized that his dad and stepmom had locked the door, and we didn't have a key. You see, we started running from their house, as there is a lake only a mile away. The lake itself is 3 miles around, so it's pretty easy to get 5 miles in if you want to make it a scenic run. Occasionally, we would do just that. Phillip knocked on the neighbors' door to see if they might have a spare key. Nope. He asked to use their phone to call his dad. His dad and stepmom were actually at the same lake taking a walk, only they had driven over.

Great, so on top of the 13 miles I had already run for the day, I went ahead and ran 2 miles more, FAST, over to the lake and back to get the key. I think I ran something like a 6:46 average pace for the 2 miles. It was something ridiculous like that, way too fast for having been back from Boston for only 2 weeks. Again, may or may not have been my stupidest mistake thus far in 2008.

The next day (Thursday) I ran a normal 8 miles at lunch, and the day after (Friday) I took the day off. I was pretty sore from DOMS. Then something happened. Saturday, as I was running my normal 8 miles, I noticed a twinge in my left knee. My first thought was that I had been overcompensating in other parts of my leg and foot for my stupid toe. I may or may not have been right, but I kept running. Sunday I ran again, and the same thing happened. Soooooooo I didn't run the next day, Monday. I decided to let it rest and try it again on Tuesday.

Tuesday, May 19th, ran outside with Phillip, to change it up. It didn't hurt at all. Only got 2 miles in after work, but I also did the arc trainer at lunch that day. Little did I know how much that arc trainer would become my friend...

However, Wednesday, May 20th, I tried running at lunch again. 8 miles, pain after 5 miles. Thursday, May 22nd, 8 miles and still the same pain after 5 miles. Friday, no run, only the elliptical machine for an hour after work.

Phillip and I moved into a new apartment Memorial Day weekend, May 24th through May 26th. I took those days completely off. Thought it would help my knee and do it wonders with three freaking days off! Yeah. Right.

Tuesday, May 27th, ran 2 miles and it was back. The pain was intense. So I did the elliptical for an hour. Well, I thought to myself, I was crosstraining for so long and I stopped. Maybe this will get me back into the swing of doing it again. HA! Little did I know...

Wednesday, May 28th, I took the day off from activities, and Thursday I flew to Amarillo to help my dad move to Midland. That's an entirely different topic. His brother offered him a job working as a partner in his company in Midland, and my dad accepted. After 25 years of being at Coors!!! I couldn't believe it, but it was a great change for him. He needed it after my mom passing away. He needed something positive to take him away from a job that he didn't really like, but spent way too much time doing simply because he didn't want to go home to an empty house. I think he's doing well now. He's happy in Midland, working with my uncle, travelling all the time, having plenty of free time, and I think he's getting ready to build a house there. I hope he's enjoying life despite the huge void that is there for all of us. :(

Anyway, when I flew to Amarillo I worked late into the night (11:00 pm) on Thursday helping my dad, and didn't get to run...not that I needed to or wanted to. I had severe knee pain. Friday I decided to test it out. Ran my 8 miles, sure, but it was painful again after the 5th mile. Saturday I had a noon flight back to Omaha, and when I arrived, Phillip and I went on a 9 mile bike ride. Not much, but at least it was something. Knee still hurt.

Sunday I decided to try running again. This was June 1st. I decided if I was to run that day and the pain was still there, the next day I would make an appointment with a Physical Therapist and figure out if the diagnosis was, in fact, ITBS, which is what I suspected. I ran 8 miles that Sunday, and called the PT the next morning.

Haha, even though the pain was there, I still ran 8 miles that day.

The PT said she could see me that evening, so I went by and found out the inevitable: it was ITBS. She gave me the typical strengthening exercises and basically said I could do anything at all, so long as it didn't hurt. Once the activity started to hurt, I was to stop doing it and try something else. Okay, that's fine. I would have no problem with that.

We have those machines I was talking about, the Cybex Arc Trainers, at my office. I normally use only the treadmill, balking at the people who use those Trainers. Um, yeah, not anymore. I have consistently used that Arc Trainer for weeks now, 7 weeks, to be exact, and I have never felt stronger. I have seen my hips and thighs go from being puny little runner's legs (which is GREAT, don't get me wrong--I don't mind what I had before) to these things of steel. I can't believe how strong my lower body is now. I will not say I have never been this way, as I did the elliptical machine for an hour every day for 3 years before I would run for an hour. I guess I just forgot.

I'll give you an example of how my legs have strengthened. The first week of June I did only the Arc Trainer every day, both at lunch for an hour and after work for an hour. I did that the next week, as well. The week after that, after Father's Day, I tried running. I ran Monday, June 16th, to see how my leg would feel. I ran 5.5 miles with minimal pain. I tried running Thursday, May 19th, only 5 miles. Still a little pain. Not gone, so not normal. Keep going with the crosstraining. Only a couple of runs and the pain is still there.

The next week, still doing 2 hours of crosstraining per day, I decided to try running again Thursday, June 26th. Just 5.75 miles, but nearly no pain. Decided to try again the next day, Friday, June 27th. A little pain. Not ready yet. Back to crosstraining.

More running, 5.5 miles, on July 3rd. I don't know why I thought that anything would change just because it was a holiday, haha. Still some pain there. More crosstraining. Tried running again Monday, June 7th. Same, but was able to run more miles without pain. Ran 6 miles that day. Two days later I ran 6 miles again, and two days after that 6 miles again. Two days after that was really cool--I ran 9.5 miles.

Monday, the day after the 9.5 miler, I decided I would try to see an ART therapist. ART therapy is something I have heard a lot about, but was squeemish about trying. Now I know why. I tried it two different days, a Monday and a Wednesday, and the guy wanted me to come back for two more days. It didn't really help, and I don't want someone artificially popping my back. No thanks.

The ART therapist told me to try running that first day he saw me. I ran 8 miles, but they felt as they had been for a while--probably about 90%. I ran on Thursday as well, and I ran 8 miles that day. Then Saturday I ran freaking 11.5 miles. I couldn't believe it. I just whipped it right out. That's the furthest I have run in 2 months.

That was last week. I ran 8 miles on Monday, and today I plan to run another here in a few minutes. Keep in mind that every day, whether I am running or not, I have been doing the Arc Trainer. If I run, I do an hour of running and an hour of the Arc Trainer. If I don't run I do 2 hours of the Arc Trainer. I am still the same weight as I always have been, and I feel like I'm still in the same shape. I have been running all my mileage at or just below (or just above!!) my normal pace.

Hopefully this means I'm coming back from this. Hopefully. I have a life and career changing event coming up in the next month, but I'm going to save that for another blog entry.

Thanks for reading. :)

Siblings.

2008-04-27T20:00:00.005-05:00

I can't believe I forgot about the drama that occurred over the Boston trip! It's so ridiculous, but what can you expect from my narcissistic, immature, 25 year old sister.

So, it started out with my dad, sister, and brother arriving late (10:00ish) Saturday night to our hotel in Westborough. I knew, KNEW, my brother and sister would NOT be going with us to the Olympic Trials the next morning, as it would be about 8:00 am, or so, when we would leave. I thought to myself, "Well, that's fine. They should be ready to go by 1:00 pm when we get back to the hotel. Surely."

Nooooot so much.

My sister was not ready when we returned, at 1:00 pm. She wasn't even out of bed, from what my brother says...ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS.

So, we get to the hotel, ready to go to lunch and hang out in Boston for a while. I'm guessing my dad went into their hotel room, saw that she wasn't ready, and got mad at her. She, in turn, yelled at he and my brother, who, for some reason went OUT of the room, which she then took as an opportunity to lock them out. Of the hotel room.

Well, after about 30 minutes I realized that my dad wasn't calling me to go anywhere. I called him, dreading knowing what he would say about leaving--like that it would be another 30 minutes or so. Yeah. He said he was in the lobby, waiting on her to reopen the door so they could go back in.

WHAT THE FUCK!

He ended up having to ask the front desk what they could do about it, and they said nothing, honestly. Turns out they had to get someone from another hotel to bring over a tool that they use to get into hotel rooms in case they are jammed or something. 20 minutes later they show up, but, right before that time guess who decides to come out?

That's right. Little fucking brat.

Phillip and I had decided to leave and get lunch. We weren't going to wait on her ass. And my dad and brother just sat there, waiting in the lobby. When we got back to the hotel, they were still waiting. She kept them waiting down there for 2 hours!!!!!!!

So Phillip and I say we're going up to our room, to just relax and hang out for the rest of the day. It was already after 3:00 pm, and I wanted to relax before the next morning. I did NOT want to deal with her.

We went to get on the elevator, and lo and behold who gets off when it reaches the first floor? That's right, little miss immature herself. So I just ignore her, trying to get onto the elevator. Keep in mind I had not seen her yet at this point, not since Christmas, actually. She steps off the elevator, reaches out her arms and says, "Gimme a hug."

Hahaha.

Not likely. I said, "I'm not giving you a hug," and got on the elevator. Bitch thinks I'm going to let her ruin my weekend. She made the weekend all about her, even though they were there for a marathon that I was running in.

And of course my dad took her side.

Apparently, they went out and paraded through the city and had a grand old time. When they got back, my dad had the AUDACITY to come into our room and ask me to apologize to her. I told him no, that I would not apologize for something she did. He said that she wouldn't go to the marathon if I didn't apologize. You think I care?

She didn't go to the marathon, and she spent the next day, all day, in the hotel room.

New England is where I wanna be...

2008-04-26T19:25:00.004-05:00

In my excitement over Boston, I forgot to mention in my last blog posting about the trip Phillip and I made the day AFTER the marathon. Our flight left Rhode Island at 5:30 pm, so we decided to make the most of the day. We left the hotel around noon, drove to Foxborough (maybe a 30 minute drive, maximum?), picked up some Subway, and made our way down the street to the one and only place I thought I would never see:

The NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS stadium!!!

Too bad Wayne couldn't be there. ;)

Marathon #2 - Boston

2008-04-23T20:36:00.002-05:00

There’s no short version of this. Too bad.

On September 23rd, 2007, I ran my first marathon, the Omaha Marathon, and qualified for the Boston Marathon with a time of 3:22:40. I only needed a 3:40:00 for my age group, so that was completely taken care of.

Well here we are, just shy of 7 months later, and I can now consider myself part of the official finishers of the Boston Marathon. Medal and all.

Phillip and I flew into Providence, Rhode Island on Saturday, April 19th. We checked out our rental car and drove to the hotel. Once we got all checked in there and unloaded our bags, we decided to go for one last run. Phillip changed his clothes, got his garmin, and headed out the door for his 4 miles. I opted for the treadmill to run my last 5 miles before the marathon. Later that afternoon, after we had showered and eaten, Phillip and I drove over to Hopkinton to view the race course. It was a beautiful day!! We got to see the entire set up for the marathon, and even got to walk right over the start line. Phillip got pictures of me, both at the start line and standing by the flame.

That night, I did not sleep at all. I woke up every couple of hours, and one of the times I woke up I could not get my bearings. I didn’t know where I was, or where the bathroom was, and I had to really concentrate on what was going on. I finally figured out where I was, went to the bathroom and got back into bed, only to wake up again a couple of hours later thinking I would be running the marathon that morning! Arggh!

The next day Phillip, my dad, and I drove down to Boston to watch the Olympic Trials. We didn’t get there until 8:30 am, so they had already begun. No problem, though, we just wanted to get a glimpse of them and eventually see who won. Almost immediately, I received a text message from Roots, to whom I had sent my phone number prior to the trip. He told me where they (he, Flounder, and SisterGoldenHair) were standing, watching the trials, and Phillip, my dad, and I made our way over to find them. It was awesome finally meeting up with them! We got pictures, all of us, and luckily, my dad was there so we could all get in the picture.

Everyone asked me what my strategy was for the next day—uhh…I don’t know? Yeah, I had no idea. I just knew I wanted to be at the halfway point by no sooner than 1:32. Yep, so that’s it. That’s my strategy. And I wouldn’t be wearing the garmin. So, I was going to rely only on feel. And my Timex for my splits.

After the trials my dad, Phillip, and I went to the expo for my bib # and other goodies. I picked up my shirt and bib #, a poster, and bought a Boston Marathon Adidas jacket, Adidas wind pants, and Adidas shorts. Haha, I really overdid it on the merchandise apparel. But dammit, I earned it! BUT—then I thought about how unhappy I would feel if, after I bought all those products, I didn’t finish…I was extremely worried about the race, at that point.

We left the expo around mid-evening, just in time to go pick up some food, head back to the hotel, shower and eat before we finally settled into bed.

The weirdest thing about this marathon, compared to my other marathon, is that the night before this one I actually slept more than 3 hours. Phillip and I went to bed around 10:00 pm, and I think I immediately fell asleep. Hard to imagine, considering how freaking nervous I have been for months and months…our alarms (one on the phone, one on the actual alarm clock, and a wake-up call) were set for 5:00 am. I planned to get up, brush my teeth, drink my normal 32 oz. of water that I drink every morning, and wait until 6:30 am to roll around. At 6:15 am, Phillip went downstairs and started the rental car. I could hardly muster a word I was such a complete bundle of nerves. I was literally shaking.

Because we stayed in Westborough, just 30 minutes from the starting line, we had an easy time driving over that morning. We took a back road, and there were no cars anywhere in sight. We had to get to Hopkinton by 7:30 am because at that time all roads into Hopkinton would be closed. The time was only 7:00 am when we arrived in Hopkinton, and we had to drive around to look for parking. We had planned to park close to the corrals and as soon as my corral was released, I would just go and jump right in. Around 7:30 am, we finally found a place to park in the parking lot of a church just a few hundred feet from the corrals. There were port-a-johns in the parking lot, so that would be completely convenient. My bib number was 9170, so my corral was 9. Where we had parked was right on the other side of a building from it!

And it’s a good thing they were that close because we sat there for 2 hours, and I think I visited those port-a-johns at least 3 or 4 times.

Had I been in the “Athlete Village” I would have been released at 9:20 am, so around 9:15 am me, Phillip, my dad, and my brother walked over to the corrals. I got into the corral and stood there, waiting on it to fill up. It was full within a minute.

John Kerry was there—I think he was involved with the race somehow, I forget—and I actually saw him walk by! He walked right by me, as though it was Phillip walking by me. That’s how close he was. It was pretty interesting because I think that is the closest I have ever been to someone famous. Anyway, back to the story. There were all these athletes around me that had qualified in the same time I had, and they were all older than me, it seemed like. There was a woman and a man directly behind me to my left, and they were talking about how much fun the race was going to be. I asked them what their goal was. “To finish, and to have fun.” I said, “Hmm, maybe I should hang with you guys…” The woman said, “Yes! You should. You earned it.” I asked them how many times they had run the Boston Marathon and they both said this would be their first time. They asked me, I told them it was my second marathon and first Boston, and they said I was lucky, that it usually takes at least a couple of attempts for someone to qualify.

And then it was announced that the race was about to start. The gun was fired and we started moving forward…S L O W L Y…I kept talking to those two people, and after some time we got to the clock. It had been 10 minutes exactly. So, the gun time would be 10 minutes slower than my actual race time. No big deal, easy enough to figure out. I started my watch for the first lap and I was off.

I had been telling myself repeatedly that I needed to start off on a slow foot, not push through the first mile. It was supposedly all down hill, and from looking at the racecourse the day before, I knew it. So, I decided to take it E A S Y.

I took it easy, all right. It’s not like it was hard, though. There were so many people. Ridiculous amounts of people. I have never raced under those kinds of conditions, and it is definitely a lot harder to make your way through when there are people EVERYWHERE. When I looked up at the mile marker, which came very fast, actually, I hit my lap button. Whoa!!

Mile 1 – 7:53 (sound familiar?)

Interesting. I actually paced myself correctly down the hill. I knew I needed to speed it up a little, though, or I wouldn’t be able to make it up later. I just kept running through the mass of people, trying not to bob and weave and lose too much energy. I ended up doing pretty well because, once the second mile came up and I pushed the lap button again, I noticed I was getting just a little faster. Good. No problem making up the time from then on.

Mile 2 – 7:22

From that point on, it got really hot. At race start it was foggy and overcast, probably right around 50 degrees. But once the gun went off, the sun came out, and during the entire flat(ter) portion of the race (mile 3 through probably mile 15) it was HOT. I actually have pretty bad sunburn on the entire right side of my body. I saw so many people drinking water at mile 3, some already taking Gu and Powergel. Not a good sign. I just kept running, wondering if the race would end up turning into a Chicago Marathon type situation. I hoped not.

Mile 3 – 7:13

Okay, time to step it up and get busy, I decided. People weren’t clearing out, that’s for sure, but I needed to get around some of them or I would never get anywhere. For the next 10 miles, all I did was concentrate on maneuvering around the slow people, dodging water stations and people throwing cups, and feeling my way through the race, making sure to keep a steady, easy pace, one that wasn’t going to kill me in the end. I made it my goal to keep track of my splits, too, because I knew that would get me through the race. It did in the Omaha Marathon. I also thought about all of my family and friends watching the 5k splits, and I wondered what everyone was thinking as I crossed each of those mats.

Mile 4 – 6:53
Mile 5 – 7:09

About this time, I started noticing the difference in my quads. They were like, “what the F was all that down hill about?”

Mile 6 – 7:05
Mile 7 – 6:55
Mile 8 – 6:57
Mile 9 – 6:58
Mile 10 – 7:05

Around the 10th mile, I started feeling like I was losing energy? Maybe? So I decided it might be time to take the Gu I had in my shorts. I took it out, ripped it open, and swallowed it down, just in time to see a water station. I grabbed a cup, drank a few drops down, and kept on going. Maybe it made a difference, maybe it didn’t. I don’t know.

Mile 11 – 7:01
Mile 12 – 6:57
Mile 13 – 7:00

At some point during those miles, I noticed a girl running around the same pace as I was, trying to just get out of everyone’s way and keep running. She had “English” on her back. Phillip told me later that he saw her in my corral before the race. I asked her what she was trying for. She said between a 3:15 and a 3:20. I told her I was trying for around the same, and she said, “Do you want to see my splits?” They were written on her arm in marker. I told her no, that I was doing ok. We came upon a water station at that point, and we got split up. I never saw her again.

All along the way, and I know this is probably repetitive for you people reading who have already run Boston, there were so many people playing music, playing the drums and the guitar, handing out water, icees, orange slices, bananas, soda?, candy, anything with sugar. It was so bizarre. I never even thought about that kind of thing happening. I didn’t get anything, just kept running.

Mile 14 – 7:10
Mile 15 – 7:06
Mile 16 – 7:04

I slapped as many kid’s hands as I could—it kept me going. Really. It was such a nice feeling to know that these kids were spending their morning out there cheering runners on, and for no reason other than that, they were just excited to be there. I also heard, “Go team Nebraska!!!” more times than I can count. Speaking of which, it was about the time the hills started, mile 17, that I noticed people walking, all kinds of runners. Guys who looked like they were in GREAT shape. They just couldn’t do it. I ran past them, and at this point, the passing began. I passed literally THOUSANDS of people in the next 9.2 miles. Between mile 16 and 17 people were also handing out Powergel in all flavors, and at this point, I picked up a couple, making a mental note to take the next one at mile 20. I don’t know why; it just seemed like a good idea. I put one in my shorts and carried one in my hand.

Mile 17 – 7:23
Mile 18 – 7:17
Mile 19 – 7:08
Mile 20 – 7:12

At Mile 20, I took the Powergel I had in my hand. Again, don’t know if it helped, but whatever. I don’t train with those things so I don’t know what it feels like to know if they boost your energy or not. It was also at this point when I really started looking around. There were literally 2 women near. It remained that way for the rest of the race. There were just women sprinkled (if you could even call it that) through the remaining few runners I was passing. I passed so many people. I passed people walking, passing out, laying on the ground, stopping to stretch, everything. I just kept on running.

Mile 21 – 7:24
Mile 22 – 6:59
Mile 23 – 7:12
Mile 24 – 7:02
Mile 25 – 7:13 (I know that Heartbreak Hill is supposed to be the hardest, but the hill at this mile is CLEARLY difficult after you’ve been running first down hill and then back up. I thought this hill was the hardest; the other ones were like running in Omaha)

I turned the corner onto Boylston Street, the last stretch before the finish. I saw the finish line, the balloons and big sign saying, “FINISH,” and it was like hearing music. I could feel the energy building. I ran as fast as I could, which probably wasn’t very fast, and tried to reach that finish line. I knew I could make it. I heard my name—looked to the right—it was Phillip, my dad, and my brother!!! Another boost of energy. I felt like I was high. I could see all these people on both sides of the street in stands, thousands of them, yelling, screaming, forcing us to the finish. It was AWESOME.

In the end, I only noticed two people pass by me. They must have been holding out for the fast finish. I was doing just fine. I felt wonderful just to be there! It was everything they said it would be.

Mile 26 and .2 – 8:38

I made my way through the finish line, held my hands up, and after crossing the line, slowed down to a stop. I was finished. My legs were crying, especially my quads. I walked, slowly, to the water station ahead and grabbed a water bottle from the nearest person. Walked some more and let them place a heat sheet around me. I’ve never had that before, and I remembered what someone told me way before going to this race—“let them treat you like you deserve to be treated. Let them do all they can for you. That’s why they’re there.” Walked some more and noticed the chips were being taken off. I bent over as much as I could and untied my shoe. Then I had to stand there!! (it hurt so bad) and let the woman take my chip off my shoe and retie it. Then she placed my medal around my head…

Eventually I found the “J” and there were Phillip, my dad, and my brother!! I just fell into Phillip’s arms I was so exhausted. My legs were going nowhere, so we sat on the sidewalk. That felt soooo good. (I should have done that right after I finished. I think it would have been a better idea.)

After I got my bearings and could stand up, we started walking the two blocks to the car. Along the way I told Phillip I should probably call Will, my team president. He was in Boston for the trials, and I knew he was at the marathon, but I didn’t know if he knew anything about times or anything.

We were about halfway to the car when—aaaaccckkk! Who do we run into? Will! He gave me a huge hug and said he was so proud of me, saying that he wanted a picture. We got one, talked a while longer, and then kept going.

So, I’m sure that by this time you all want this thing to end. Soon, I promise.

That night I just showered and sat around the hotel room and relaxed, wearing my Boston Marathon Adidas pants (guess they were worth it after all).

Skip forward to the plane ride home—we sat next to a guy on the plane who, long story short, works for a company called Elite Racing. Apparently, the company is based out of the UK and recruits elite athletes for the Rock N’ Roll Marathons, and they are right now working on getting their own standards made. The guy asked how I did in the marathon, and Phillip told him all about my race and my racing past, and the guy asked him for my email address. He gave us his email address and asked us to keep in touch, saying that he wanted us to keep him informed on my future races so that if their standards equal mine, we could get something going. I’ll let Phillip explain further on that, if anyone cares. But holy crap!! Phillip said he feels like my manager, haha.

Official time:
3:07:24
101st AG (18 – 34)
2017/21963 OA
124/8935 OA Woman

This is also a 15:16 PR, and based on my half time of 1:33:18, while it is a positive split, it is only by 44 seconds. I can’t even believe it. At Boston. The entire second half is hills?!

As for now, I feel very sore, but not as bad as yesterday. I’m sure it will be a few days before I start running again, and even then it will be really easy paces. Who knows what is in the future—according to Will, it’s going to be Twin Cities, and that’s great. All I know is, I could use a flat race.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot—I guess all of my treadmill training, training sans hills, and training wearing Nikes is doing me absolutely NO good.

Under the gun...and counting.

2008-04-18T14:30:00.000-05:00

Two days...that's all.

I have two days to force my mind to come up with some sort of plan of action, some reasonable quality effort to put towards this race.

THE BOSTON MARATHON

What could be better, right?

Haha, should be grand, but yet, I have these reservations.

It's because of my legs and feet. The legs are not 100%, they just aren't, let's face it. And my feet--don't get me started there. I feel like my feet are punishing me for trying to do too much over the past 6 months.

But listen, I needed to run all those months after my mom died. I could NOT have made it through without doing so. And I received tons of PR's from those months of running...but now when I want to run the biggest race of my life, my legs and feet are suffering.

I have received so much in the way of luck in the past couple of days. I have had two people at work tell me that I'll go under 3:00, and that's without them even knowing what I've done thus far! They have no idea what I run every day, they have no idea what I've done in races, and they are still that confident I will run sub-3:00 in this marathon?

If they can be so positive, why can't I?

Too long...

2008-04-13T21:16:00.002-05:00

I can't believe it's been nearly 3 years since I last posted here. I think what I may do is move all my race reports over to this blog, start blogging here, and forget freaking MySpace, Facebook, everything. That crap is overrated anyway.

Eisenhower Half Marathon

2008-04-05T22:20:00.002-05:00

Ok, so let’s just go ahead and say I’m better at long distance than short distance.

I ran the Eisenhower Half Marathon in Abilene, KS, at 7:00 am this morning. The temperature was around 40 at the start, but the high today was to be 68, so I wasn’t worried about a warm up. It was dark when we started, and I was nervous as hell (as usual).

There were other races going on concurrently with the Half—a marathon, a 10k, and a 5k. Wasn’t concerned with any of those people.

One goal in mind as I started this Half Marathon this morning:
average a 7:00 pace (in preparation for Boston), making my goal time 1:31:42. Wasn’t sure I could do it, wasn’t sure I wanted to try. But, we made a 5-hour trip for me to run the race, the race was paid for by Team Nebraska, and we had a free hotel stay. So it was worth an attempt.

Bonus: If I won 1st, 2nd, or 3rd, Overall Woman, I would receive $150, $125, or $75, respectively. Not a big concern, though, really. I wasn’t trying to win, only train.

So, I started out, trying to just get a feel for a comfortable pace. I decided not to wear my garmin because I wanted to do it on my own. The course was an out and back, heading south, then east circling through a park, heading south from the park, eventually reaching a turnaround, going north and back through the park, then heading back to the start. What I didn’t know was how beautiful the run would actually be!! I had a great time during the run—the scenery was absolutely breathtaking.

Mile 1 – I just ran along, trying to feel things out. At the mile marker a guy was ticking off times. I ran by and he said 6:45. Well, that was probably too fast, but I wasn’t feeling too overwhelmed. I decided to just keep on going.

Mile 2 - We crossed a highway bridge that passed over a river—beautiful!!! I realized at this time that there were a couple of guys directly in front of me. I decided to hang onto their pace for a little bit, as they were going pretty fast and smooth. I also knew that there were 3 women in front of me. No matter. Not my goal.

Mile 3 – As we headed through the magnificent park, I finally asked these guys what kind of pace they were trying to hold. One guy said 6:45. I said what is our pace now? He said 6:45. I stuck with them until the turnaround, the 6.55 mile point.

Mile 4 – We crossed over another little wooden bridge. Awesome!

Mile 5 – Pretty standard. OH, except for the massive hill we climbed to the turnaround. And that I got to see my sweetheart waiting for me on the horizon!

Turnaround, or 6.55 miles – Again they were ticking off times. I ran by—44:59. PERFECT! Now all I had to do was keep going at a pretty solid pace and I might actually be able to take it easy at the end.

Mile 6.55 and on – Passed those two fellows I was hanging with and just kept on going at a comfortable pace. I ran by Phillip, he said I was looking good, and I kept on going.

Mile 8 or so, back through the park – I caught the 3rd woman. I thought she was slowing down so as just to tail me for a little while, and then towards the end just ramrod me. I stayed slow with her for a bit…nope, she was done for. Kept going…

Miles 9 to 13 – Just ran what I thought was comfortable. No real news, except that just ahead about 30 seconds or so I could see the 2nd woman. Not to worry. Not my goal.

Last .10 – I kicked it up a notch, as I had some left to give. Ran in, looked at the clock, heard Phillip say, "Freaking awesome baby, I’m so proud of you!" and I was done.

The one and only time I ever ran a Half Marathon, September 9, 2006: 1:33:21.

Eisenhower Half Marathon, April 5, 2008: 1:27:44.

Difference: priceless. Not really, haha! Actually it was a 5:06 difference!!!

And, what’s more, if you look at the difference between the first half and the second half of the race you will notice a difference in the split time. That’s right, a negative split!

The first 6.55 miles I ran in 44:59 (6:53 average pace)
The second 6.55 miles I ran in 42:45 (6:32 average pace)
=2:14 negative split!!!

SO, although I didn’t try, I made 5 achievements today instead of the 1 goal that I set out for—

1. Kept at least a 7:00 pace
2. PR’ed
3. Scored a negative split, bigtime
4. Scored 3rd overall woman, so I got the $75 prize winnings after all.
5. And I found out later that I got 6th place overall! There were only 3 other men and 2 other women in front of me.

Official –
1:27:44, 6:42 average pace, 6th Overall, 3rd Overall Female

Official Photos from the Shamrock Shuffle 8k

2008-04-01T21:00:00.003-05:00

Shamrock Shuffle 8k

2008-03-31T20:00:00.012-05:00

The day before this race, Phillip and I arrived and hung out with Dave all day.

This race turned out to be everything I did NOT expect it to be. Given that my legs and feet have been so sore and debilitated the past couple months, I had the worst of expectations. Honestly. I expected my time to suck, I expected to really let myself down, I expected the weather might be perfect--making it even more of a depressing event because then not ONLY would I not do well, but I couldn’t say the weather had a factor in it-- and I expected to be late, or worse, not even be able to participate due to illness…the only reason I decided to run the Shamrock Shuffle 8k is because I had already registered for it, and because I had received a great opportunity to start at the front of a race with 30,000 participants! I wanted to enjoy that achievement.

However! Though my time was not as good as it probably could have been--considering once again I started out too fast--it was a PR, the weather was crappy awful, and I was actually feeling better than I had in a couple of months (I’ve run two races in 2008, one in January, which happened to be my first 8k, and a 5k on March 17th, both of which I was sick during). And really, that’s more than I could have asked for. Well, that, and to beat my two KR competitors, John and Dave.

Because of a previous 5k time qualification, I got to start in the Top 100 at the Shamrock Shuffle 8k. I’ve never had this sort of thing happen before. I didn’t really know what it would be like—until I walked up to the front and got in the "Top 100" area. I quickly realized how the race officials treat this level of athletes. They ask all kinds of questions, like, "Are you okay?" "You can warm up by running down the street to the crowd if you’d like" (which was about 400 yards), "does that watch measure your heart rate?" I saw so many of what I guess were elite runners, none of which I planned to even see again after the gun. There was a guy beside me that asked another guy what his planned time was for the 8k. The other guy said, "Oh, I think maybe I’ll try for 27:00 today. We’ll see how it goes." Are you kidding me? So nonchalantly, like he’s about to take a shower or something.

Anyway, I walked up to the Top 100 area around 9:00 am. The race didn’t start until 9:30 am, but I wanted to be there in plenty of time, so as for them not to close the gate and not allow me in. Plus, Phillip had already gone back to his place in the Second Wave of the Open Corral, and I didn’t have anything else to do. Turns out I was the first one there…oops. I didn’t see any other Top 100 people until probably 15 minutes later, when another girl came up and started warming up. I guess getting there that early is a no-no. Haha!

As I said, whenever I walked up to my area I didn’t see any bibs that had the numbers 1 to 100 on them, (the Top 100 had bib numbers of 1 to 100 on them), so I asked the Race Officials who were standing there where I was supposed to go. They said, "Oh, you’re the first one. You can just go up there, in front of the gates. You can warm up if you want."

Wow. It was just such an awesome feeling to be in that environment that the entire experience, race and all, just seems like kind of a blur. During the time I was standing there I heard my name, "Tonya!" and looked up to see a man calling me from the front of Corral A. I walked over to him John introduced ourselves, said our good lucks, and I went back up to my "area."

I had been warming up a little bit while I was standing there, jumping around, and occasionally I ran out towards the front where we were all allowed to run. The last time I ran out they started the National Anthem, and when I returned I got into place. I had decided I wanted to start in the back, considering I wasn’t planning on running a 27:00 8k. ? The National Anthem ended, the one Wheelchair participant started, and they didn’t waste any time—we were off.

I started out running only what I thought I could run, not worrying about my pace or anything, just listening to my body. I had told Phillip that morning that I wanted to try for 6:10 to 6:12 splits. I wanted to at least do that. The unfortunate thing is that I don’t have the exact splits; I only remember what I saw at the 5k marker, and I was pleased. I noticed, wow! I was at my PR for a 5k, 18:52. Imagine that. And only 2 weeks ago I ran a crappy (for me), illness-affected 19:25.

I ran along, feeling great until I reached mile 4. Then the fatigue started kicking in from going out too fast on the first 2 miles. Somewhere along 4.5 miles I saw John run by. $@*^$! I did all I could just to dart up the hill that came at the final close, but in the end I know that I probably had a terrible split for that mile. I don’t know, though, and UGGH I wish I did. It would be interesting to see. As we rounded the corner and started running towards the finish line, I just gave it my all and ran as fast as I could muster.

As I ran in there were race officials directing us. One of them said, "Team Nebraska on the right!" so that’s where I went, to the right. I ran through the finish line and was glad it was over. I had given it everything I had for that day. I walked on through and tried to digest what I had just done—I knew I had PR’ed! I also felt totally fine with my time, no matter what the official time was, because I knew that over the past couple of months I had even debated doing this race, mostly because I felt unconfident, achy, run-down, over-trained, etc. I also knew that I had run the first 5k of the race in what was my 5k PR, so I knew I still had that in me! My time ended up smashing my one and only PR for this distance (31:56) by 1:19!

Official time: 30:37 (6:09 average pace)
Age group: 7 of 4,429 (25-29) – Top .1%
Females: 15 of 12,175 – Top .1%
Overall: 192 of 22,558 – Top .8%

I was just walking along and I noticed someone walking towards me. It was John. We started talking and then Dave joined us from behind. We all walked the rest of the way to the end, meeting John’s wife along the way. I knew that Phillip would be finishing in a little while, so Dave and I walked over and got in the ridiculously long line to pick up our stuff. We had JUST gotten our bags and put our jackets on, and were going to walk over and try to get a photo of Phillip coming through the finish line, when I turned around and Phillip was walking towards us!

What????

His time ended up being 37:30 instead of the 45:00 he had projected. I couldn’t believe it! I almost fell over! That was great! I am so extremely proud of him. He’s come so far in his training, and just over a few months!

Dave left to find his girlfriend and Phillip and I walked over to the post-race expo to try to find some warmth. No luck there. We did find John, though, and he got to meet Phillip.

It was a great day for all. Phillip and I got to spend a weekend with some great people, and many thanks to Dave for all his hospitality! Unfortunately, we didn’t get a photo with John, even though we tried to find him again, right after we had parted ways at the expo. We didn’t get a big group KickRunner photo either. We just all weren’t together at the same time! But Phillip did get a photo of me with a bag-piper after the race, and of course the photos of us the day before the race, when we officially arrived in Chicago…

Shamrock Shuffle 8k

2008-03-28T19:05:00.004-05:00

Tomorrow morning Phillip and I will be flying to Chicago for one of the more (locally) revered races in the world, the Shamrock Shuffle 8k (4.97 miles). He and I will both be participating, along with 29,998 others.

Over 2 months ago I posted a blog about this upcoming weekend, explaining all the details and importance of it. Because the Shamrock Shuffle 8k is larger than the Boston Marathon, which is only 25,000 runners, there are 2 waves and 4 Corrals to separate the runners into, mostly so that we don’t all trample one another. Especially all those FAST people who are going to be running WAY faster than the rest of us. ;)

We arrive in Chicago tomorrow at 10:20 am, so I don’t really know what we’ll do over the course of the day, but we’re meeting up with a friend of ours who is so graciously allowing us to stay in his apartment for the night. He will be running in the Shamrock Shuffle as well, and I expect it will be quite the competition between us (even though I’m in the Top 100 and he’s in Corral A). Phillip and I met up with him and his girlfriend at a race once before, back in October 2007, when we ran the Comer Kid’s Classic 5k. Even though I won Overall Female that day, he beat me, but we’ll see about this time. I’m thinking we’re about even in our current level of fitness.

I’ll post the link here, and you can all go see the race for yourself.

I love Chicago!

Running is for the birds.

2008-03-12T23:00:00.002-05:00

Okay, my run at lunch was so great in a lot of ways, and yet not so great because of one thing: the 20 mph wind. UGGGGHHH. Kept me back from what I know could have been record-breaking paces the entire way.

Anyway, started out at 1:30 pm with 2 co-workers who asked me to join them on their run. After 1.60 miles there is a major street connection, and that’s where they turned around. I kept going, and man were there some hills. Good training though for sure. I’m serious. I’m going to load my garmin data later so that you all can have a looksee.

Numbers were as follows:

.30 miles not recorded because Garmin was finding satellite.
Measured it on the return trip.
Mile 1 - 8:35 (with co-workers)
Mile 2 - 8:05
Mile 3 - 7:19
Mile 4 - 6:50
Mile 5 - 6:28
Mile 6 - 7:03
.38 - 7:38

Total for the run - 6.38 miles, 47:14, 7:25 average pace

So, I could have gone further, and DEFINITELY faster, but the damn wind was so strong I was afraid I wouldn’t make it back in time. Plus those hills slowed me down just a little. I went from my office to the Interstate, then turned around and came back.

Once I got back I decided to go ahead and run my usual 8 miles, so I ran 2 miles on the treadmill. Seemed freaking easy as crap.

.68 miles @ 7:53 pace
.60 miles @ 7:30 pace
.72 miles @ 7:04 pace

Total for that run - 2.00 miles, 15:02, 7:31 pace

So, in all, I ran 8.38 miles today in 62:16, average pace 7:26, plus a little .30 miles in there that weren’t timed. I’ll upload that elevation data.

Chiller Challenge 8k Results/HUGE news!

2008-01-27T19:40:00.002-06:00

Sooooooooooooooooo, turns out those bathroom trips weren't nerves. That's right--I'm sick. Chills right now, possible fever, but it was an all right race, believe it or not. No PR, I must warn, but not far off my last time for an 8k. And BELIEVE ME--this wasn't a pretty race. I almost quit (seriously) after Mile 2. I felt HORRIBLE.

When Phillip and I arrived at the race, I knew I was going to be off on my times--not normal anyway. I felt weird. I thought I would make the best of it, though, since I went ahead and made it out there. No sense in not starting what you set out to do.

The course was sooooo great, and beautiful! I've never run at this particular park before, but I will again, that's for sure. It will be excellent for running in the warmer months. And it looks like I might be running outside a whole lot more--but more about that later.

The course was completely flat. It started out on roads, but at about 1/2 mile went onto pavement (bike trail). The paths were snow covered in some spots, really throughout the entire race, so that slowed people down quite a bit. I don't think that would have been a factor for me, though, had I been 100%. At a mile and a half there is a turnaround, and we went back from whence we came, back over the bike path, back to the road. From there, we went 2 miles on another out and back, which was completely on the road. The road led us into the finish.

I knew I was doing good the first minute or two, and after probably the first mile, I realized I was right on track for my time--but then I started to feel HORRIBLE. I looked at my garmin and I had run a 5:57 first mile, but the way I felt after that, I knew I wouldn't be able to keep it up. I was absolutely right.

After I saw the Mile 2 marker, I seriously thought about quitting. Seriously. I was breathing heavy, my times were dragging, and I knew I was going to NOT PR. My second mile was 6:14. But I decided to keep going because, when I started out, I was running with 10 guys, all of who were still near me. NO GIRLS. I thought, no matter what, I had to finish, if not just to get OA Woman.

I kept going, but it got progressively worse. The feeling I had was really wearing on me. Phillip said he could tell big time when I passed by him on the way back through. I ran through Mile 3, and I realized I had just been staring at the ground, just making sure that I wasn't going to fall, or worse. I felt so awful. My third mile was 6:20.

The fourth mile was so bad, I don't even really remember anything after that. Just trying to get back and finish. Fourth mile was 6:41.

Fifth mile I saw the president of Team Nebraska. He was standing at about the 4.50 mile area, where Phillip was also standing. Phillip told me after the race that when I ran by the guy said something about me. Who knows what. I ran into the finish line and I was just thinking, "Get this tag off of me!" so I could get water and sit down. Fifth mile I must have really been dying to get there because my time was 6:28.

SO, overall, not a bad race, considering. I mean, I don't really remember it, but it was good, I guess. I ended up being 11th Overall, and 1st OA woman. I was also 1st out of 30 in my age group, which was actually a weird age group—19 to 39. My time overall was 31:56, only 55 seconds off my PR of 31:01.

So, for the record—

11/161 OA
1/30 AG
1/25 OA Woman

We headed into the pavilion where the food and awards were located. Phillip got me some water, and I just sat at one of the tables feeling like I would pass out at any minute.

After about 10 or 15 minutes, I see two people walking my way, a girl and a guy. They were from Team Nebraska, and one of them was the President. Found out a few minutes later that the girl was the Vice President. Anyway, he congratulated me on my performance, and said that he knew who I was and that I had won the Omaha Marathon. He said he remembered that I had written him right after I won the marathon and that I had asked him if I could be a part of the team. He asked if I was still interested.

UHHHHH.

He said that he had been really busy over the last few months of the year because he is the President of the USATF Nationals Committee, or something of that sort. He was in Ohio, Hawaii, and was planning the Olympic Trials in New York in November 2007. He's in charge of planning all the US National Competitions around the country. That's why he hasn't gotten back to me. I don't know how much truth there is in that reason why he didn't get back to me, but whatever. He told me the benefits of being on the team--40% off Brooks products because they sponsor the team, free Clif products, teamwear (red shorts and red singlet with Team Nebraska on them), free entry into any races I want to run in, along with other things.

He then asked what my goal was for myself at this point. I said that I really like marathons, and that they are what I would like to focus on. He said good, that he had looked at my performances over the last year, and that's what he had in mind for me. He also said that there are two women on the team now that are going to the Olympic Trials this spring, but that after that they are both going down to shorter distances, so I would be the sole female marathoner after April. He really wants me to be on the team I guess, because he talked to me for about 30 minutes.

He asked me about my training for Boston and who wrote the plan, and I said me. He just gave me this look of surprise. At another point, he asked who was coaching me, and I said no one. He just looked at the Vice President with a look of excitement (per Phillip, I don't remember much of this). Later I was talking about what races I wanted to run this year, and I told him I wanted to run New York. He said that I should run the Twin Cities marathon with the team because it's one of their national competitions, and that he already has a goal time in mind for me. He said not to worry about running New York this year because being a part of the team automatically grants me entrance into most USATF events.

We talked about it and he asked me what my goal is in the long run. I said to go to the Olympics, that has always been my goal. He said great! That's what I wanted to hear. (Phillip noticed on their website that if the runner and the President come to an agreement on a goal, that it is more likely that the runner will be able to become a part of the team).

So, long story short, (ha), he told me to shoot him another email with my running log attached, and that he'll send me my discount codes for Brooks gear, and a bio sheet to fill out for the website. I am probably going to have to run outside a lot more, which sucks, and I have to listen to his coaching, which also sucks because it limits me in my mileage. No more running bizarre mileage whenever I feel like it. But I think I could be better. So I think I'm going to do it.

What do you all think I should do?

Jitters.

2008-01-27T10:25:00.000-06:00

I woke up at 9:00 am, after having slept a restless night of dreaming of racing...ughh. I do that all the time. Then, as I was lying there talking to Phillip about how nervous I am, I realized I really needed to make a trip to the bathroom because the kids were definitely ready to go...and here it is, 9:49 am, and I have been in there 6, yes 6, times.

Nervous-much?

I still feel like I could go in there again. Stupid kids.

Anyway, I hope this feeling is gone by 12:45. That's the time of the race. Otherwise, I may have a full load by the time I get to the finish line...

Sorry.

Brain Dump

2008-01-23T23:40:00.001-06:00

Ok, so, quite a few things going on over here in my world. I'm going to put them all out here, mostly to get them off my mind and actually see the events organized in some fashion.

First of all, I want to make the comment that my training has reached a whole new level of quality. I can't even begin to tell everyone on here how much my running ability has improved. I honestly can't make you understand if you don't know how running works--it's nothing against anyone, just that usually people don't understand because they simply don't care. However, in the event that a select few do care, 'll just tell you a couple of things, a few statistics to put things in perspective.

As of December 31st, 2007, I:
--Ran a total of 2643.9 miles,
--Ran 16 races, including nine 5k's (3.1 miles), three 10k's (6.2 miles), two 5 mile races, a marathon, and a 10 mile race.
--I won the marathon.
--I won five of the 5k's, got second overall in two, and the other two were just not worth mentioning.
--I won the 10 mile race.
--I was second overall woman in one of the 5 mile races, finishing only 1 minute after the winner, who is also training for the Olympics for her third time. The other 5 mile race I finished 5th overall woman.
--I won two of the 10k's. I got second overall woman in the other 10k.
--I finished in the top 10 of 10 of these races, including winning one race completely.

Now, I know that is a lot to retain, but I promise, all of that information is important for what is to come. As some of you may know, I have qualified to run in the Boston Marathon in April, as well as the New York Marathon in November. I plan to do both, but I have already registered for the Boston Marathon. Because I had already decided to run in the Boston Marathon, I began looking for training programs way back in November to (sort of) follow. i found one, and this is what it is called, just to give you an idea of how serious I am about this:

Competitive Marathon Program
A training schedule for competitive runners who want to improve performance in the marathon
race distance.

It is 20 weeks long; therefore, I started it on December 3, 2007, in order to run it through all the way up to the Boston Marathon, April 21, 2008.

As of today, I have made plans to do several things over the next few months. Here they are, in order:
1. Chiller Challenge 8k in Omaha - January 27, 2008 (this is equal to 4.97 miles)
2. Deep Freeze 5k in Omaha - February 11, 2008, which Phillip will be doing also.
3. Shamrock Shuffle 8k (the world's largest 8k, 30,000 people) in Chicago - March 30, 2008, which Phillip will be doing also.
4. Boston Marathon (26.2 miles) in Boston - April 21, 2008

So, I need to say a few things about events 3 and 4.

First of all, the Shamrock Shuffle is, like I stated above, the world's largest 8k. So there will be people from all over the world at this event--30,000 people in Chicago for this race, and we'll be there. Because there are so many people participating, they have to start the race in waves and corrals. There are two waves, the first wave containing 5 corrals: Top 100 (elite runners), A, B, C, and D. Not only that, though, but to be placed in one of these corrals, you must have a qualifying time from 2007, based on your time for a race you ran. Wave Two is for people who do not have a qualifying time, they're just racing.

In order to compete in the Top 100, with the elites (Kenyans, Nairobis, etc.)--
well, I'll just show you what it says on the website:

WAVE 1 (approx. 10,000 participants)
Top 100: Qualify by 2006-2007 performance in Shamrock Shuffle or 2007-2008 5K - Half Marathon results or previous start corral qualifier*. Submit time by fax to 312-904-9808. Male: <5:15 per mile; Female: < 6:15 per mile.

Corral A: Qualify by 2007 performance in Shamrock Shuffle, Distance Classic, Chicago Marathon or previous start corral qualifier*. Male: <7:00 per mile; Female: <7:30 per mile.

Corral B: Qualify by 2007 performance in Shamrock Shuffle, Distance Classic, Chicago Marathon or previous start corral qualifier*. Male and Female: <8:30 per mile.

Corral C: Qualify by 2006-2007 performance in Shamrock Shuffle, Distance Classic, Chicago Marathon or previous start corral qualifier*. Male and Female: <9:30 per mile.

Corral D: Any past participant in 2005-2007 Chicago Marathon.

WAVE 2 (approx. 15,000 participants)
Open: Past and new participants, average pace 11:00 per mile.

As of today, guess where I'm going to be starting? YOU KNOW IT! Right up there in the Top 100!!! This a HUGE opportunity for me. If I do well at this race, who knows what might happen...

Okay, on to the Boston Marathon. As of today, we have purchased flights to Boston for Saturday, April 19, through Tuesday, April 22. The marathon is actually on Monday, April 21, but we arrive Saturday for sightseeing, and Sunday we plan to watch the Women's Olympic Trials in the morning. That afternoon we'll pick up my race packet, and then I'll get a good night's sleep (doubtful). Then Monday morning at 10:00 am I'll be pounding the pavement with 24,999 other people.

Whew. What a start to the year.

The Daily Post

2008-01-07T22:45:00.003-06:00

Powder

2007-12-08T19:46:00.001-06:00

Snow! I can't believe it. We had snow Thursday, around 5 inches or so, and today it's been
pretty horrible outside. The sun failed to show it's bright little head, and snow started
falling around 5:00 pm, I guess. The wind blew all day, too, making it nearly unbearable
to go outside and walk around.

Right now the temperature is sitting at a measly 15 degrees, wind chill of 7.
I will place some photos that I shot just a few minutes ago--

The Golden Compass

2007-12-01T19:40:00.000-06:00

God, I've been so busy lately. And it's about to get worse, with Monday being the day
I start my 20-week training program for the Boston Marathon. I can't wait, though. It's
going to rock!

Anyway, so there are many, many things I do every day, and I'm so exhausted by the
end of the day that I don't really care if I post what I would really like/want to on this blog.
For those of you wondering why I haven't really been in contact, it's because my typical day
goes like this:

--Get out of bed at 6 am, showering and getting ready for work, leaving
the house at 7:30 am (or later, depending on if I'm running late, which is most of the time)
--Do some work from whenever I arrive at work to around 12:30
--Go downstairs and change into running clothes
--Run for an hour on the awesome-ass treadmills we have in our company fitness center,
while watching Martha Stewart
--Change back into work clothes
--Head back upstairs to make my lunch and eat it at my desk
--Work until 5:00 pm
--Leave work at 5:00 or so
--Either go back downstairs and run for another hour, or head to the gym and do
the elliptical machine for an hour
--Drive home
--Take a shower
--Eat
--Relax and watch tv for a couple of hours
--Go to bed

Every day. I love doing it, but sometimes I think I do too much, even for my standards.
I'm curious how many people would like to live my life for me? Haha, didn't think so.

----------------------------------------------------

On a different note, today there was freezing rain, ice, snow, fog, and general
horrible weather outside. Most every event was canceled, and one of the interstates
was closed. It was advised if you didn't have to get out, to not. So I ran 12 miles on the
treadmill here, and did 4 loads of laundry.

ANYWAY.

So the point of this blog today is not to complain about my day, or complain in general,
really. It's really supposed to be about this coming Friday, December 7th. I want to see
this movie that is coming out, but Phillip will be working from 6:00 to 11:00 that night,
and every night next weekend. So we can't go see it the weekend it comes out. I
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLYYYYYY
want to see it. I mean, really.

I was wondering if anyone would like to go with me?
That's all.

Bye!

Fremont 5 Mile Turkey Trot Results, Photos, Video...

2007-11-22T18:10:00.001-06:00

Today I ran my second 5 Mile race ever—first one was May 28, 2007, therefore an obvious PR at 33:43. The other day I looked at the McMillan calculator to kind of give me an idea on what my goal should be for this race. According to my last 5k time, 18:52, I should have been able to run a 31:06 today. So I just set my goal as something near or around that.

Well, I'll spare you all the details, mainly because it's not very interesting, but when Phillip and I lined up at the race start, I noticed that there were a handful of the Team Nebraska people there. There were a few guys from the Team, and one girl. I had seen her at a few other races, but I have always beaten her. I thought I might have a chance, just maybe.

Inside the YMCA, where the race started from, I had also noticed some other girls from some of the races I've raced in lately. All these girls were pretty fast so I knew that, if anything, the cold weather would be the one factor to keep me behind the game. Being from Nebraska, all those girls would be accustomed to this type of weather.

The weather was, in fact, COLD. The temperature when we started was 22 with light flurries, slight wind. I stayed inside until we started lining up, mainly to keep my legs warm. The race would be an out and back, sort of a "C" shape, from the map on the Garmin.

When the gun sounded, I started off with the goal in mind to run past every girl I encountered, as is always my goal first and foremost. I looked down at the Garmin .25 mile out and realized I was running way too fast, faster than I wanted to, that's for sure—5:48 minute mile—and I knew it. I was freezing! Whoa! Slow down. Slowed down to about a 6:07 pace or so, and tried to keep that pace for the remainder of the race, as much as it hurt to run in the cold.

After the turnaround, 2.5 miles, I quickly realized I was the second girl overall. I had seen the Team Nebraska girl pass me by—she had at least a minute on me, meaning I could either step it up—not likely with the way I was feeling in the cold—or keep going at current pace, which was varying between 6:15 and 6:30. I decided if I caught her, good for me, and if not, at least I would PR.

Oh, to hell with it. I'll just give you my time and my splits and be done with it.

1 – 6:08
2 – 6:27
3 – 6:23
4 – 6:15
5 – 6:31 (that's with 10 seconds extra, since I forgot to turn off my Garmin until 10 seconds after I stopped).

Unofficial time – 31:01 (When I saw 30:55 on the clock, I gave it my all to step it up and meet 31:00. But I just didn't make it).
So, there it is. 4 seconds off my predicted goal time, I guess.

Thanksgiving's for the Birds.

2007-11-22T07:45:00.000-06:00

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO EVERYONE!!!

And Happy Birthday to my hubby Phillip!
Please pass him a line if you read this.

Three things:
1. Phillip and I are running a 5 Mile Turkey Trot this morning at 9:30!
See more here.
As always, be back soon with the results...

2. It's freaking 21 degrees outside right now, with a wind chill of 11. It snowed
yesterday, so there's a little bit of the white stuff left on the ground, making it even colder.
YAY.

3. I'm not home for Thanksgiving with my family. :(
That makes me want to cry. In fact, I have. But I think it probably has more to
do with my mom no longer being with us. Who knows.

Okay, we're OUT>

Time and Space

2007-11-06T23:45:00.000-06:00

I guess it's about time for this update.
I had never imagined things happening this quickly.
Then again who does, right?

Here's how it went:

September 23 - I ran the Omaha Marathon and won it, along with qualifying for both the Boston and
New York Marathons.

September 24 through September 27 - My mom apparently told the entire population of
Nazareth and Amarillo that I won the Omaha Marathon, and showed them my blog on it.

September 27 (evening) - Apparently hospice went over to my parents' house to check my
mom's blood level, and deemed that she needed a blood transfusion. They planned to go
the next morning.

September 28 -

8:00 am - My parents went to hospice to get my mom's blood transfusion.

1:00 pm - I called my parents house to see if they had gotten the mail, because
I had sent them something. No answer. I called my dad to see what was up, and
he said that he and my mom had gone to the hospital to get a blood transfusion
that morning, and that they'd be there all day, most likely. At that time, he
was going to get his laptop from work, and then he was going by home to get
the mail, to get them something to eat, and then he was going back to the
hospital. i told him to call me when he got back to the hospital.

3:00 pm - Called my dad back to see if he had received my mail, and when I
asked him about it, he went into a run-on sentence about how my mom wasn't
doing well and that she was kind of out of it and how he thought I might want
to get a flight to Amarillo as soon as I could.

WHAT?

At that time I had been on the way home from the gym, and I panicked. I couldn't
get home fast enough. I pulled up to the house, jumped out of the jeep, and
told Phillip the news, after which he immediately started looking for flights for me
while I dove right into packing. I had just begun packing when my dad called back.
He said, "Yeah, you definitely want to get on the first flight you can. I'll pay for it.
Just do it." So I continued to panic and pack, and Phillip said there were no flights
that night, only one in the morning for 5:00 am, which would put me in Amarillo
at 9:45 am Saturday morning. That would have to do. It was all I COULD do.

I called my dad back and told him. He said, "That's not going to be soon enough.
Can you get anything tonight?" Of course there was nothing, so I told him, and he
said that that would have to do, and that he hoped it would be okay until the morning.

As I was packing, my uncle called twice, and my dad called once more. The time my
dad called was around 8:00 pm that evening. He said it was looking really bad and
that I just needed to stay on the phone with them. I did, and around 8:20 pm, Friday,
September 28, 2007, my mom was gone.

I didn't make it in time.

The next day my sister told me that my mom asked about me twice, if I was on my
way, or if I was coming. :(

I got off the phone with my dad around 9:00 pm, and told him to call me if he needed
anything before morning. Of course I knew I would not be sleeping that night, and I didn't.
My dad ended up calling me around 10:00 pm and said that his boss was sending his
private jet and pilot to pick up Phillip and I from the TAC Air base in Omaha. The pilot
would be there at 1:40 am. We finished getting everything together and I just paced
the floor until 12:00 am. We left to go to the airport, and we had a 3 hour flight to
Amarillo. We arrived in Amarillo at 5:00 am, and I finally got to sleep at 6:00 am.
I slept about 2 hours, and then I got up to get ready to face the next few torturous
days.

September 29 - People started showing up at 9:00 am, bringing food, or just coming
by to stay for awhile. We had lunch that my dad's family brought by, and nearly every
one of my mom's and dad's family were there. It really sucked because I didn't want
to be there. So me, my dad, sister, brother, and Phillip went to the funeral home
around 11:00 to take care of the funeral arrangements, (fast, I know, but you have
to do that, I guess), because my dad wanted the funeral set for Monday, October 1,
2007.

We left there, and Phillip, my sister, my brother, and I went to get some stuff to
wear for the funeral. It took a while to find stuff, and we arrived back home at
about 5:30 pm. My dad was planning to have a family viewing of the casket that night
at 7:00 pm, so Phillip and I dropped off my sister and brother and went back up
to the funeral home.

This was the first time I got to see my mom since September 18. It was so hard.
I cried for an hour and a half, until everyone else arrived to view her body. I still
cried, but it was during that hour and a half that I came to realize that she was
really gone. Before that I had just heard that she was gone. They could have been
lying to me for all I knew.

September 30 - At around 5:00 pm, we drove with the hearse to Nazareth, and that
night there was a prayer service at the church in Nazareth. It was a blur. We all
came back to Amarillo that night, just to have some time to refresh for the next
day.

October 1 - We left to go to Nazareth around 11:00 am, because there was a lunch
being put on for us by my dad's family. Both sides of the family were there. I ate
nothing.

4:00 pm - We all attended the mass and burial of my mother. It was the single
most saddest day of my entire life. I cannot express to you the feelings I felt that
day, or to this day now.

My dad is not the same man as he was. He keeps busy ALL the time, undoubtedly
so that he doesn't have to think about how much free time he actually DOES have.
He loved my mom with everything he had. They were married 29 years, and he
will never marry again. I don't want him to, and he won't. My mom was the best
thing about our family, and she always will be.

Elkhorn Turkey Trot 5k

2007-11-03T16:50:00.002-05:00

The Turkey Trot I ran in this morning was an out and back--out from
an activity center, through a school parking lot, through a neighborhood, and then back again. We arrived 30 minutes early or so, and I got my bib and race packet. It was a cold 30 degrees, but nice, clear, and sunny. Perfect for a morning run.

I was looking around and my eye caught a guy from Team Nebraska.
I'm not sure, but I think he was the only one from the team that was
participating. He won, of course. Some absurd time of 15:32, or
thereabouts.

It wasn't anything different than a normal 5k. Before the race I had
been inside the building, and my garmin didn't have a signal. I didn't
know this, however, because when the gun went off, I pushed it to
start it, but when I looked at it the next time, it was only calculating
my time. So for the entire race, I really didn't know what pace I was running.

The course went through a sharp uphill, then flat for about .25, then
a sharp downhill for .25 or so. It was less than encouraging
because I knew I was going to be coming back up that hill...

The second mile was nice and flat, through a neighborhood. Around
1.25 I saw the Team Nebraska guy passing back by me.

Ridiculous.

Around Mile 2, I caught up with a couple of guys and passed them
with ease. One of the guys said, "Let's try to keep up with her."
As I ran back up that huge hill I told you about, they caught up with
me and passed me, but I quickly passed them once we were
back on level ground. As I started to pass them, one of the guys
had to stop--to throw up. At first the other guy kept running, but then
I guess he decided better of it, turned around, and went back to help
his friend.

From the time I started the race to the end, I hauled a$$ (as much
as I could). I say as much as I could because my legs were still
sore from the nearly 19 miles I ran Thursday, plus the 8+ I ran
yesterday. I can only IMAGINE what my time would have been
had I not been so sore. Maybe next time I'll actually think about that,
seeing as how I've done that twice now--run 16+ miles a day or two
before the 5k. I'm an idiot sometimes.

As I ran the downhill back to the finish line, I heard people clapping,
Phillip yelling, "GO TONYA!" and just general cheers. Then I heard
the guy say my time, counting it down as I approached the finish
line--18:48, 18:50, 18:52--time!

PR - 18:52, and I made my goal.

Right before the race I had told Phillip I would like to try to run
6:00 miles, or just PR. Looks like I did it! I'm so excited!
I won a gift certificate for $100 to a local nursery, so flowers
or trees, I guess, here I come (most likely a re-gift ). I also
won a gift certificate towards a Road ID, a gift card to a local
grocery store, and a medal, which is super cool (has a turkey
on it).

Overall a great race. I would suggest it to anyone in the area,
as it was EXTREMELY well put on. Nicely done for only a second
year event.

Turkey Trot 5k

2007-11-03T09:10:00.001-05:00

Turkey Trot 5k this morning at 10:00!

Yay! What a way to start off the weekend, with
the Olympic Trials in NY this morning, the NY Marathon
tomorrow, and the extra hour of sleep, what could be
better!

Be back with it later...

Gold's Gym 5k Update

2007-10-27T21:40:00.000-05:00

Ok. *sigh* Here goes.

The Amarillo Gold's Gym set up a race series this year consisting of 3 5k's. One was March 24th, one was June 25th, and one was today, October 27th. I ran the first 5k in March, but as many of you may recall, or probably don't, Phillip and I moved to Omaha in May, so I was not able to participate in the second race of the series. That's ok. Not a huge deal. It was a big deal at the time, when I thought about what I was actually giving up in terms of winning a 3 race series, but not anymore. After we moved to Omaha, I didn't think it would be possible to make it back to Amarillo twice more to run the other two races in the series. But things happened, and I was able to come back for the third race.

Which leads me to my story.

TWICE. Twice I was late.

When I ran the first 5k, March 24th, I was in the bathroom inside the gym, not realizing what time it actually was. As I walked out the door to the parking lot, I heard the gun go off. The start line was about a parking lot's distance away, at the end of the block, by a stop sign. I walked out and heard the gun and bolted. I knew I was late. I knew I had to put it in full gear to get caught up to the beginning of the pack. I'd say I lost maybe 30 seconds in the delay. Oddly enough, I caught up to everyone, coming in 1st woman, 7th overall, and with a time of 20:14. So do with that what you will, considering I was late...

And then there was today. The temperature was a bit nippy, 38, with 15 miles an hour wind. But it was still beautiful and sunny. The course would be the same as the first race in this series—out from the gym and back. I purposefully went to the bathroom early, and hearing over the loudspeaker that there was a minute to start, I started walking out to the start line. But let me say this first--when I arrived at the gym, I saw a friend of mine and we went for a warm-up run; therefore, I forgot to pick up my bib number. As I was walking out of the bathroom, I remembered I still needed to pick it up. I picked it up as I headed out the door. When I walked out the front doors of the gym, THIS time I see the gym manager walking through the parking lot. I give her a weird look and she says, "Oh they already started." I was like YOU'RE KIDDING! It happened again???? I started hauling, literally running as fast as I possibly could. This time, however, I was at least .25 mile away from the LAST runner. So, you can see, I lost A LOT of time. I don't know how much, never will, because in the rush I forgot to start my garmin. Oh, and I didn't get to pin my bib on my shirt. I carried it. The whole race. And I just handed it to them at the end. Everyone that was there the first time was there this time (a bunch of runners I know in Amarillo), and they all just laughed and said it wouldn't be me if I weren't late. True, I run late a lot, but never for a race. Only this series, which I am convinced was a curse or something. Just kidding, but really. I was secretly pissed. I mean, I'm competitive. I wanted to win this race too, dammit.

Anyway, I ended up getting 14th out of 64 runners, and I won my age group 20 – 29. Pretty good for starting at least a minute, minute and a half, hell, maybe even 2 minutes after the gun. My time is another story. I finished in 21:04, and I know that's got to be at least a minute off, maybe even two, like I said. I was .25 mile away from the very last runner! For god's sake.

Anyway. I'm just mad at myself. Not so much because of my placement or my time or anything. That's completely my fault and I know it. It's happened before. But the fact that I really, truly, will never know my time because I didn't start my garmin. THAT'S what irritates me to all hell.

Gold's Gym 5k

2007-10-27T08:00:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm here in Amarillo, and there is a 5k at the local Gold's Gym at 9:00 am
this morning. Guess who will be running?

More about it later--

Chicago Times

2007-10-21T21:45:00.001-05:00

Ok, I posted a blog on my race this weekend, so I figured I should also include a general summary of our overall trip to Chicago. It was the first time we had been to the city, and it was soooooooooo great!!

We arrived into town Thursday, October 18th, at 7:40 am. It was kind of cloudy and cool, and we hurriedly jumped on the shuttle to our hotel. We got to the hotel, threw our bags into the room, and ran out the door to explore the great place which we had heard so much about.

We caught the train downtown and walked around until around 3:00 pm. Believe me,
by that time, we were too exhausted to even do anything else. We went through
parks, along the shoreline of the Michigan River, into several stores, such as Garmin,
Tiffany's, and NikeTown, and just generally had a wonderful overview of the city.
Here are some of the first day's photos, in no particular order--

Comer Kid's Classic 5k

2007-10-21T01:43:00.000-05:00

So, I know this is late, but better late than never, right?
We just got back home, got settled in, all that, so it's
just now relaxation time...

I ran a 5k in Chicago this weekend, Saturday morning at 10:00 am.
I met some friends there, both of whom I know from a running forum where I post regularly, both of whom I met for the first time today, and both of whom live in Chicago.

After walking around in downtown Chicago for 8 hours on Thursday, and then (maybe not-so-wisely) running 16.4 miles Friday,
I honestly didn't think I could pull it out Saturday. I was almost right.
Almost.

Phillip and I finally arrived at the race at 9:00 am, after an hour-long, COLD bus ride across town from our hotel to the race site, the University of Chicago. I picked up my race packet, my shirt, and my chip, and walked across the lawn. Leslie yelled out "Tonya!" and I thought, "Hmm. That's weird." I guess in my cold stupor I had kind of forgotten that at least two people might recognize me when we got there. I looked over and recognized her face immediately. She said Dave was not there yet. He arrived only moments later, all meet-ups went well, and pictures were taken, etc., which I will add soon.

As we were all lining up for the race, Dave and I started towards the absolute front, with Leslie in the middle somewhere. When the race started, I started off faster than I ever have in a 5k, and I could feel it in my legs. I thought it was going to be over for me after the first mile.

Anyway, as I passed a few people by, and others were passing ME by, I noticed a girl to my left, and another up ahead of me, probably a good 100 feet or so. I was intent on beating them both, but I didn't know if I could make my legs DO that. They were just so sore. I ran, not paying attention to much around me, and I passed the girl beside me, left her back a ways. One down.

I kept running, eventually reaching the turnaround at around 1.5 miles. The girl was still ahead of me, but not as far. It would still take some work, though. As we turned at the cone, and I began to run back from whence we came, I saw Leslie. She yelled some encouragement out to me, and I kept on going.

It was around a half mile later I realized I was closing in on the girl, and fast. As I passed her, she said to me, "Nice job," and I said the same. I kept hauling butt though, as not to let her come back at me at the end. After about .25 mile, though, I never heard her again.

As I ran the rest of the way in, I heard many people on the sidelines yelling for me, letting me know I was the first girl. Let me tell you, at those times, it is so exciting to be a girl. Right toward the end, Dave's girlfriend (thank you Vanessa) yelled out some encouragement to me and took a picture.

As I ran in, I felt it. BAD. My legs are super sore. I can tell I've been killing myself over these past few weeks with a marathon just four weeks ago, a 10 mile race just 7 days ago, and this 5k, not to mention winning every single one of them. Yes, I did win this one in Chicago. My time, though not a PR, was 19:24, and I was 9th place overall. I don't know how many participants were in the race, at this point, but there were 400 chips there for pickup, so who knows.

All I know is this:
1. I'm not doing anything more for a while, probably, as my legs need time for recuperation.
2. I love my Cool Running friends.
3. My husband is the best supporter. Ever.

P.S. Phillip did not run, so he was our photographer. He got some great photos!

Chicago

2007-10-20T07:42:00.000-05:00

We are in Chicago.
I am running a 5k here this morning.

More later...

Richfield 10 Mile Run Results

2007-10-14T18:22:00.008-05:00

Here goes. It's long, so you've been warned.

Today I had my first 10 mile race, and man was I nervous.
The only goal I went out with was a time of 70:00, and I'd just
try to come as close to that time as I could. I didn't care if there
were girls in front of me, behind me, beside me, whatever. I just
wanted to run 7:00 min/miles.

Last night it started raining around 5:00 pm, and it rained all
night through this morning. It was POURING when Phillip
and I left the house at 8:00 am. We arrived at the race, picked
up our race numbers and shirts, and sat in the jeep to wait,
out of the rain. It stopped raining JUST AS the race was about
to start, luckily.

Started out at 9:10 am, a little late, and the course ran on long
country roads, south of Omaha. I started, sort of at the front,
but not too eager, since I only had a time in mind, nothing else.

The gun sounded, and off we went, me gaining quite a bit of ground
after just the first few minutes. I was in the lead with probably 10 - 12
guys, and just one other woman. She was ahead of me probably 10
feet, and she looked somewhere around the age of 40. I wasn't
worried. If I passed her, fine; if not, fine.

Around 1.5 miles, I was wondering about all the people passing me,
but then I remembered that those were probably people trying
to PR for the 3 mile race going on at the same time (which
Phillip participated in).

There was water at miles 3, 5, and 7, and the woman in front of
me grabbed a water at the 3rd mile. I did not (I usually don't drink
at all during races). She couldn't get hold of the cup properly to
drink, it looked like to me, so she slowed down to a walk. I just
kept on trucking.

There was a guy alongside me the rest of the way through miles
3 and 4. He had just been to the Boston Marathon in April, and
this was his first race since. He was probably in his 30s, and
he and I were running beside one another, straight into probably
20 miles an hour winds. It was cold--it was about 59 this morning--
and awful. But I kept on going, eventually passing the guy.

As I rounded mile 5, which was a turnaround, I got to see who
was behind me. The woman that was in front of me was probably
30 seconds behind me, and there was a girl from Team Nebraska
probably 30 seconds behind her. (Team Nebraska is a team of a
bit more elite athletes who compete in multiple sports, and you
have to be accepted or qualify to be in the group). Whenever I
saw the Team Nebraska girl, I knew I had to keep up the pace.
I was not about to let her beat me. I have always beat those
Team Nebraska women when racing against them, and I wasn't
going to let this girl beat me today.

Kept going, and around 5.5 miles a cyclist came along and
told me I was in first place. He rode just a few feet ahead of me
the rest of the race.

After mile 6 I never saw anyone again. I passed a couple of
guys somewhere between mile 7 and mile 10, but I was
alone the rest of the run. It was kind of nice, really.

When I ran in at the end, they handed me a number. It said 10.
I finished 10th overall, and first woman. My time is not official
yet, as I don't have the official results at this time. However,
my garmin said 1:08:36. (Official--1:07:13)

YES!! I made my goal, AND I won. Nothing wrong
with that.

October Events

2007-10-13T23:04:00.000-05:00

I have a whole list of events going on in my life right now--and I have to say, at least they are
positive events, considering the last few weeks of my life...

So, let's get started.

1. Tomorrow morning at 9:00 am I will be running my first race since the marathon. For those
of you who don't know about the marathon (GO BACK AND READ ABOUT IT!)
it was a real winner, and it was just a mere 3 weeks ago.

This one is a 10 mile run--should not be too difficult for me, considering I just ran a marathon, and
because I run at least 8 miles a day, sometimes up to 17. Since this is my first 10 mile race,
I'm not expecting too much, but I would like to finish in no more than 70 minutes. We'll see if
that actually happens, because 70 minutes means I'd be running a pace of 7 minute miles,
and while I've run faster than that in 5k's and 10k's, that was only 3.1 or 6.2 miles. Not 10 miles.
I mean, even in the marathon I ran a pace of 7:50 minute miles, on average, and that was
hard enough at 26.2 miles. I don't know. You probably don't even care.

On top of my 10 mile race tomorrow, Phillip will be running his first race since June 24, 2007!
The event we will be attending is called the 30th Annual Richfield Run, and it's a 1 mile, 3 mile,
and a 10 mile run. Phillip will be running the 3 mile race. He is very nervous, as he has just
started back up running. He's doing FREAKING AWESOME, and he will do great tomorrow.
Looking forward to coming back here and showing everyone his award.

2. Tomorrow morning, while Phillip and I are out in the (99% possible) rain showers, running
our races, my dad and brother are going to be in Dallas, TX, doing something I can only
dream of doing. My dad got free tickets to the Patriots/Cowboys game, and he is taking
my brother with him.

Are you freaking KIDDING me!?!?! I'm like the biggest Patriots fan ever, and my dad takes
my brother. UUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH. I hate them. Not really. I love them. But
I have been upset about this for 2 weeks now. Jerks.

3. Next weekend, or rather Thursday, October 18 through Saturday, October 20, Phillip and
I are going to Chicago. There we will be doing whatever the hell we want to do, and then
on Saturday morning at 10:00 am, I will be running a 5k that starts at the University of
Chicago. I'm going to meet up with some friends I have recently become acquainted with,
both of whom actually live IN Chicago--Dave and Leslie. They will be meeting us there.

4. The weekend after that, the weekend of Friday, October 26 through Sunday, October 28,
I will be traveling back to Amarillo to help my dad with some stuff that we still need to work
on. I will also be running a 5k THAT weekend, that Saturday, as a matter of fact. It's
the last in a series of races that are being put on by Gold's Gym in Amarillo. I ran the
first race, because we still lived in Amarillo at the time, but the second one I missed
out on because we lived here in Omaha. Now I will be running in the third race, with
nothing but a fun time in mind.

Pretty neat-o times coming up, and that's just October. Wait until later when I update
with the November events.

Over.

2007-09-29T22:33:00.000-05:00

Just an update on our mom:

We lost her as of Friday, September 28, 2007, 8:20 pm.

More later.

Quick Mom Update.

2007-09-25T11:50:00.000-05:00

Another quick update on my mom--

I talked to her last night, and apparently she has now acquired
a "lift" chair--to make it easier for her to get up and around, and to help
keep her feet elevated--and she has a "portable potty" thing that she
keeps near her so that she doesn't have to go as far to get to the restroom.

She also told me that she has taken to permanently sleeping in the lift chair,
rather than in her bed, just to make it easier on her legs. She said my dad,
therefore, has taken to sleeping in the living room as well, as he doesn't
want to leave her.

Along with not wanting to leave her at night, he doesn't want to leave her
during the day. Rather than have hospice people stay there all day, he is
starting to circulate a calendar around the family, so that she can have
constant watch without being uncomfortable or bothered.

I wish I could be there. I told her I would be there this weekend if she wants
me to come, just to place some ease on some of the people who have been
staying with her these last couple weeks. She said that I should wait, and that
I should just come back in a couple of weeks, and not to worry.

Ha! Haha! HA!

Yeah. That's funny.

New York, again?

2007-09-24T00:45:00.000-05:00

Okay, so last night I found out that I'm not only qualified for the Boston Marathon.
I was looking at the qualifications for the New York Marathon, and I qualify there
as well!!!

ARE YOU SERIOUS!?

That's not even the greatest part. The best part is that I did it by a mere 20 SECONDS.

JEEZ. Talk about a great day. I'm still not even sure it was me running that marathon
yesterday. I keep telling Phillip that.

Thought there are some of you that might like to see the online version of what is
really cool coverage that is NOT, for once, the damn Cornhuskers.

Check this out:
Omaha World-Herald

Officially Boston-bound, April 21, 2008.

2007-09-23T18:00:00.003-05:00

Okay, sorry it took so long--

The race began at 7:00 am, but my race with time started at 7:00 pm last night. I knew I had to go to bed, but I was absolutely NOT tired. My husband and I played a game of cards, and then we finally got into bed about 10:00 pm. I couldn't fall asleep, of course, and I think I finally got to sleep around 11:30. Unfortunately, I woke up around 3:30 to use the bathroom and COULD NOT go back to sleep.

Ah, well. My plan was to get up at 4:00 am, so I just lay in bed for a while longer
and got up when my alarm went off. The pre-race morning stuff went really well—
the preparing of my race bib to my shirt, the chip to shoe thing, the drinking of water for a couple hours, the whole bathroom bit —I had a really good start, so I knew it was going to be a good day. I was fully prepared by 5:30 am, and I was super, super
nervous.

At 6:00 am on the dot, we were on the road to the race. We arrived at about 6:40 or so,
and there were massive lines to the restroom. I HAD to go, or I wouldn't have made it
in the race further than a mile. I just had to pee, but it was enough to make it
uncomfortable. I stood in line and finally got in, with only 5 minutes left to race time.
Luckily, the lineup was steps away. I felt good, really good.

I found a place up towards the front of the pack, and I looked for the 3:30 pacer.
Couldn't find him. Oh well. Nothing I can do but just get ready to go. When the gun sounded, I was off. I knew I had to keep it slow; this wasn't a race against anyone.
It was a race against time. I kept that in mind as many, many people passed me—
they were all running the 10K and the Half, I told myself. They NEEDED to run
pretty quickly. I just told myself to keep running until I reached 1 mile, and then
I could see if I needed to slow down or speed up. I would be at a point where I
could easily speed it up or slow it down.

Mile 1 – 7:43:07

I had already decided I was going to keep track of every single mile, just to
see how I paced myself, overall. I knew this time was a little fast, but I was
feeling alright, and I knew there were hills coming up that would make up
that time. I just decided to keep going at that pace, because it felt completely
comfortable.

I'll cut it short here and just say that the next 7 miles were just too easy.
I can't even tell you how remarkable I felt. I started running with an older
guy around mile 4, only because I wasn't sure I was running the right way and
I wanted to ask him which race he was running. Found out he was running
the Half, so I was indeed going the right way. I was just afraid I had picked
up the path of the 10K-ers. I did NOT want to accidentally do that. Talk about
disappointment. I continued running with this guy, telling him about my running
past and whatnot, until about mile 8. He faded back and I kept going. It was here
that the first of the hills started. There were two hills here, between miles 8 and 10,
and though they looked difficult from the bus tour yesterday, they were actually
easy as crap.

It was at around mile 11 that there was a MASSIVE hill. I knew about it; I had
seen it on the bus tour yesterday. I also noticed, at this point, that there was a cyclist
coming at me. He went behind me and turned around again to talk to me.
He said to me, casually, "Hi, how are you?" I was like, "Um, fine, how are you?"
Turns out he was there to tell me that I was in third place. I couldn't even imagine
what he was saying! WHAT? How could that be? I said, "Are you sure?" He said,
"Yes, the other two are about 2 minutes ahead of you, and I just wanted to let you know."
I told him that that was fine, that I was only there to qualify, and that those women
could just go on being 1st and 2nd place.

That was only the beginning of our friendship. He ended up staying with me
the entire marathon, and it was helpful, at times. I told him a lot more about
my training along the way, and that this was my first marathon. Of course,
anyone who has run a marathon probably knows that these cyclists are there
with the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place participants. I didn't know that until the end.

Around mile 13 the cyclist from the 2nd place girl came back and told me
and my cyclist that the 2nd place girl had gone ahead to finish. You are not
going to believe this—she was supposed to be doing the Half and got off
on the wrong path! She ran 5 miles out of the way!! So that immediately
shoved me into 2nd place. It was too surreal. I can't even tell you how I
felt. I felt lucky, that's what I felt.

I'm going to kind of cut this part short, because for the remainder of the
race, I just ran. I mean, I felt freaking awesome, and when mile 16 came
along, I still felt like a million bucks. I couldn't believe it, actually. I thought
for sure that after mile 15 or so, I'd start to feel it. NOPE. I actually ended up
passing the first place girl between mile 18 and mile 19, as she stopped to
get stuff at the aid station. I never stopped, never. I just grabbed and ran.
When she stopped it put me in 1st, and she never caught back up to me.

I felt fine, for the most part, until around mile 24. At 24 I started feeling
the run. It hurt in my hips, more than anything. But it wasn't bad enough
to be concerned. I never thought I wasn't going to finish. I got about
halfway through and I told my cyclist, "Man, I'm looking forward to that
25 mile marker." He said it was coming up in about a quarter mile.

From there on out it was just a blur. I remember running that last mile, and the
cyclist telling me, "You can smile now. You did it. You finished in your
time, AND you're first." At mile 26, there was a downhill slope to the band,
the finish, and the end. He said, "Here you go. Live it up, throw your hands
up, and smile when you go through that tape. You deserve it."

So I did. They announced my name when I ran through, said it was my
first marathon, and it felt FREAKING AMAZING. I will NEVER forget it,
nor my husband, who took care of me at the end. He gave me a lawn chair
that we had brought, which I desperately needed, and water. There were
TONS of people congratulating me, talking to me, looking at me, all at once.
The news stations got my picture, there was a guy there immediately from
the Omaha World-Herald newspaper to talk to me about my run, how the
race fared, how I trained, etc. I felt like a celebrity.

I ended up getting a medal for finishing, a plaque from the RRCA,
(the Road Runners Club of America), saying that I was the 2007 Omaha
Marathon Female Open Champion, and a framed picture of some
Polar Bears? with a value of $700. We left right after receiving the
prizes, as I was exhausted, in need of a shower, and it was nearing
12:30 pm.

So, that's it. OH. I guess you all might like to see the splits for every
mile. Or maybe not. Either way, here they are:

1 – 7:43:07
2 – 7:46:23
3 – 7:30:00
4 – 7:31:93
5 – 7:28:43
6 – 7:49:93
7 – 8:00:57
8 – 8:10:19
9 – 7:40:71
10 – 7:49:34
11 – 7:56:11
12 – 7:48:14
13 – 7:24:30
14 – 7:47:54
15 – 7:34:08
16 – 7:38:42
17 – 7:33:84
18 – 7:36:03
19 – 7:31:00
20 – 7:31:19
21 – 7:16:81
22 – 7:38:01
23 – 7:47:62
24 – 7:56:21
25 – 8:12:04
26 – 8:17:59
.2 – 1:41:00

Time: 3:22:40 That's right, I qualified for Boston, baby!!! (Qualifying time was 3:40:00)
OA Woman Winner
22nd out of 446 people

The Short Story

2007-09-23T16:05:00.000-05:00

The short story is this:

I had a freaking PHENOMENAL race, and I finished 22nd out of 390
participants!!!

Oh yeah--I also was the first woman to come in!!!
I was like, ARE YOU SERIOUS?
Talk about unexpected!!! And, on top of that, I
finished in 3 hours, 22 minutes, and 40 seconds.

I QUALIFIED FOR THE BOSTON MARATHON!!
(my qualifying time was 3 hours and 40 minutes)

I'll post more later tonight, like pictures, maybe
a video or two. But here's a little taste, since my
friend Susan was impatiently waiting... ;)

Nothing

2007-09-23T04:37:00.000-05:00

Well, here goes nothing.

Marathon News/Mom News

2007-09-22T19:50:00.000-05:00

AAACCCCKKKK!!!! Less than 12 hours until my first marathon happens...I am
a huge bundle of nerves. I went to pick up my race packet today, which
includes my race number and other goodies. Also took a tour of the marathon
route--can I just say: might be kind of hard, from the looks of mile 9 through
mile 13. Through those 4 miles there are some hills, and pretty tough ones at that.

So, we'll see tomorrow. My time to go for is 3 hours and 40 minutes. I have
to finish in that time to qualify for the Boston Marathon. I will do it, or in my
mind, I won't have done my best. I am a stickler that way, "anal" for those
of you out there who know what that is like. ..

I'll come back here and let you know what happens, of course. The race starts
at 7:00 am tomorrow morning, and I should be finished by 10:40, if all goes
as planned. If you remember, I tried to run a marathon in Dallas back on
April 1st, 2007. It didn't happen because there were traffic problems and
I missed the start of the race. This time IT WILL HAPPEN dammit.

------------------------------------------

In other news, I talked to my mom today. As of this morning, she is being put
on Lasix, a diauretic that is used to decrease swelling. When I talked to her, she
told me that the swelling is no longer just in her calves and feet, but has gone
all the way up to her hips. She has to take the Lasix to help relieve the fluid
so that she can walk around and move comfortably. The only problem is the
Lasix is a diauretic, meaning she will be using the bathroom quite a bit. Because
of this, the in-home hospice nurses were also going to be instilling a permanent
catheter.

I left only 4 days ago, and things have already progressed this much. I don't
know how to deal with it at this point, and from here in Omaha. I just want
to be there with her, I want to help both her and my dad. I just want to relieve
some of the pressure from my dad, and ease his pain. I know he has to be dying
a little inside every time something new happens. I know I am.

My only positive thought at this point is that I am doing this marathon for
my mom, which she knows. Before I left Amarillo I told her that I was going
to do this for her--I started running the first time she found out she had
cancer, and I'm still running for her.

This one is for her.

Borrowed Time

2007-09-17T21:35:00.000-05:00

So since I arrived in Amarillo Friday, September 14, a multitude of events have happened.
I wanted to tell my friends, that way I could feel some relief from the
pressure I feel on my chest and shoulders. And because I know my brother
reads these blogs occasionally.

When I arrived Friday at 12:30, my mom had just driven back from Nazareth.
She had been staying with my grandparents for a few days. The fact that she
could drive herself home is a good thing; Labor Day weekend she was there
and my grandma had to bring her back to Amarillo. At that time she had
started to have swelling in her legs and feet, and she was having a hard
time doing any sort of walking. She said her legs feel like they weigh 30
pounds each when they are at their most swollen.

She and my dad had gone to the doctor the day after Labor Day, September 4th,
and asked them what the deal was and what was causing the swelling. The short
story is this:

The tumor in her lungs have grown quite a bit and are blocking a lot of her airway.
Also, the protein in her body is not being broken down the way it should be, and that
is what is causing her feet and legs to swell. She has to keep her feet elevated
at any point when she is sitting down, and because of the blockage in her airway,
she has a hard time breathing--so she has stopped sleeping in her bed. Because
she is scared she'll stop breathing when she's asleep, she has started sleeping
in a reclined position on the couch with her feet up. And since I've been here,
she won't sleep in the living room without someone in the room. So my dad and
I have taken turns with her. I stay up until 1:00 or 2:00 am, my usual, and then I go
and get him and he goes into the living room to sleep in the recliner. Last night
we did this and it worked out really well. She went to sleep around midnight, and she
slept for 6 hours, until my dad got up to go to work. That's the first time she's slept
that long at night in two weeks, my dad said.

Anyway, so today was the first day I was here all day with her by myself. My dad
was at work, and planned to come home at 3:00 pm to meet with a lady from
in-home hospice and see what they need to do for my mom (the doctor suggested
it when they went to see him on September 4th).

All day my mom was uncomfortable. She couldn't breathe very well, and around 2:00
she was extremely exhausted. She wanted to sleep, but any way she would sit or lay
she couldn't breathe. So I tried to comfort her by sitting beside her and letting her lean
against me. It was the only way she could breathe. She said something that really
surprised me--she said she thought she was going to have to have oxygen to help her
breathe. She said she hated to admit it, but that is what she thought it would take.
The position we were sitting in helped because after 30 minutes she was deep asleep.

My dad came home around 3:00, and the hospice lady came and talked to us. She
told us everything they offer, and I think my parents are going to do it. More about
that later. But the lady did say that she thought we should go ahead and order some
oxygen from the home health care place here, and now. My dad called them and
ordered it, and now my mom is breathing well on an oxygen tank. She will probably
use it all the time; she seems more at ease.

I leave tomorrow. I don't want to, but I don't know if I can do this anymore this
week. Next week should be better. I plan to come back around September 27th or
so, unless there's no need for it. I just want to be here as much as I can, considering
how rapidly she's deteriorated JUST IN THE LAST 3 DAYS.

I found out something last night from my aunt. I went to talk to her because I just
couldn't take it anymore, and needed to vent and cry for a good 2 hours. She helped
a lot, more than I thought she would, and she told me something my parents neglected
to mention to me, probably because they are trying to protect me. I was floored.

The doctors gave my mom 2 months to live.

Doldrums

2007-09-15T22:06:00.000-05:00

I don't know if I'm just not as strong as I used to be, or what.
I just know that I can't do this anymore. Not like I used to.

For the last 8 or 9 years, I've been able to keep my composure,
keep enough strength up for me and the rest of my family. I
could do anything that was needed, and be unaffected by it,
emotionally.

Not anymore.

I just don't know if I can sit here for the next 2.5 days
and see my mom in this condition. I know why my sister
and brother have chosen to kind of, in their own way,
NOT deal with it. You know--like they don't really seem
(on the outside) affected by the whole thing. I just can't
do that. I can't keep it in and not express the things I'm
feeling. I just want to cry, but I can't. I won't let myself
do it in the house.

Today I went to the gym for my usual 8 mile run. I
was okay most of the time; it gave me my usual release.
When I had about 5 minutes left, though, I just couldn't
do it anymore. I knew I was about to have to go home
and see my mom again, in the state she is in, and I was
dreading it big time. So I cried the last 5 minutes
of my run.

When I came home, though, she had actually been sleeping
for about 2 hours. She did really well for the rest of the
day, and into the evening. I cooked dinner and did some
laundry, after doing a butt load of laundry and cleaning
yesterday, also.

Around an hour ago, though, she asked me
to give her her pain pills. That's a good thing. She needs
them to feel less pain. Trouble is, the pills make it to
where she is incoherent, for the most part, when she
takes them. I know now what a heroine addict must
look like after shooting up. I mean, I guess.

So, sorry if this is depressing. I need to get it out, though.
I'm all alone here. My dad is here, but he is used to it. My
sister and brother are not here, and Phillip could not come
because of work and school, which I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND.
I just don't get to say all this to him right now, and sometimes
I just like writing it better anyway.

Recall

2007-09-12T21:31:00.000-05:00

This blog is for no one in particular. I just need to get this stuff out
and keep a record of it somewhere, and I figured people who don't
know the entire story might be spared me having
to tell it later.

Think about all the people in the world, every single person who has
or might have cancer, and all the different types of cancers there
are out there.

Now imagine that, out of the millions of types of cancers that are
out there, there is one category of cancers called sarcoma,
which is a set of cancers that consists of 7 types within.

I guess you could compare it to one company out of the millions
of companies in the world, and this one company has 7 employees.
Or something.

These 7 types of sarcomas all have a certain characteristic
in people they cling to, such as:

one type pops up only in kids,
one pops up only within the fat cells,
one pops up only in the bones,
one pops up only in the soft tissues, etc.

You get the point. There are only 7, so these sarcomas are very rare.

Now imagine that one of the 7 sarcomas, the one that pops up in the
soft tissues, is divided into its own set of categories, around
15 of them. These 15 categories make up only 7% of the entire
world of cancers. Among these 15 categories there is one that is
only common in 1% of the 7%. It is known as leiomyosarcoma.
And only 4 out of every million people acquires it.

My mother has had leiomysarcoma for the past 9 years. Her
first tumor popped up when I was only 20, my sister was 16,
and my brother was 11. This one was on her
vena cava vein, the one that goes through your entire body
and delivers all its nutrients to the appropriate places, including
the stomach. Part of this vein in her stomach had the tumor
on it and had to be removed and replaced with a piece of artificial
vein, along with one of her kidneys removed.

The next year she had a tumor on her left arm, the entire humerus
bone, to be exact. She and my dad spent Halloween through the
first week in December at MD Anderson in Houston getting it
removed and a steel rod put in its place. My siblings and I had
to join them in her hospital room for Thanksgiving that year.
I hate doctors. She almost died.

The next year the doctors found nothing, luckily, but the year
after that they found spots on her lungs. Like, 13 spots. From
the very beginning, the doctors only expected her to live, at the
most, 5 years. But, she is strong, and for the spots on her
lungs she decided to go with chemo. Again, she almost died
because of the effect the chemo had on her.

So the spots went away, and we thought all was well. Until
2 years ago. She started to have a nagging pain in her tail bone.
She went to the doctor and found out, sure enough, it was the
same cancer, back on her sacrum (tail bone) this time. She
had to quit her job, because she could no longer sit without
pain, and eventually she had to start wearing pain patches
that she changes out every 3 days. They emit a constant
stream of morphine throughout her body. Also, she has
pain pills, which she tries not to take much of, because she
doesn't want to become addicted. She has lost all use of her
1/2 functionality, mostly because the tumor is so large, and
it sits right on her sciatic nerve. So she has to use a daily little
catheter the size of a straw, and do enemas to go. Sorry if this
is grossing you out.

Well, last year the doctors informed us that the cancer had
spread throughout her body, including into her intestines, her
lungs (again), her stomach (again), and onto her rib cage on
both sides. She has gone from being a healthy 138
pound woman to now, I'm not really sure because she won't
tell me, around 80 pounds. She is able to get around, but she
doesn't do much in a given day. She mostly does laundry for
my dad, and cooks occasionally.

Since we have moved to Omaha, my parents don't call much.
It's natural, it's happened before when I moved away. I got a
call from my dad last night, who doesn't typically call me out
of the blue, and he told me that she is not doing well.

Now, it has to be pretty bad because, for one thing, he said
it is and he never admits things like that, and for another
he said that the cancer has really "taken a toll on her."
And he said that part 3 times. So, needless to say,
I'm going to Amarillo as much as I can between now and
the end of time.

Sorry if this was too long. It helped to get it out, actually.

Home.

2007-09-12T14:10:00.000-05:00

Okay, so it looks like I will be traveling back to Amarillo this weekend.
Friday through Tuesday, to be exact. It's last minute, but it has to do
with my mom's health. For those of you who know about my mom's
condition, she's not doing well at all. One reason I know this is because
my dad called me last night and told me that the cancer is really taking
a toll on her.

He told me that 3 times on the phone, and he sounded as though he might
cry.

My dad doesn't ever call me, and I've never seen him cry.

So I'll be in Amarillo this weekend. I hope to see some of you, but if not,
I'll probably be back sometime in October for the same reason.

Good day.

Results of the Go Girl Run! 5k

2007-09-03T14:10:00.005-05:00

1/145!

I did it! The Go Girl Run! all girl 5K took place (lucky for me) on the same trail as the 10K I ran a couple of weeks ago. It was an out and back running and biking trail--Keystone Trail. When I started out, there were about 8 girls around me--some part of Team Nebraska, an organization of runners who all ran XC or something in high school or college, and I think they had all run this race last year. The winner from last year was in the front of the pack, showing off her race bib (1), clearly confident she was going to win again.

When they sounded the gun, all 8 of us began running together, with others close behind--you know the drill. After probably half a mile, I
passed 5 of the women around me, and I was in 3rd place...not good
enough! But I decided to stick it out in that position for a while,
because if I had moved ahead at this point, it's never happened
before, but I have a feeling I would have fallen back at the end from exhaustion...

I stayed probably 15 feet behind these two girls most of the rest of the
way to the turnaround, and by the time we reached that point, we were
all turning around in single file. I knew that I had to do something right
there; I had to begin to think about passing at least the next girl in front
of me. At probably a mile and three quarters I sailed past the second girl,
trying to put some distance between us. It wasn't hard; she fell back a bit.

I knew I had to pass the girl in front of me--guess who it was?
That's right, the winner from last year. I was going to go ahead and
pick up the pace, but I decided not to because all the other runners
were going by on our left, congratulating us, and the path was too
crowded at this point to pass. Plus I wanted to save that energy
until I needed it. I wasn't going to let her catch back up to me at the
end because I was worn out.

When there was a free space, probably around mile 2, I went ahead
and passed her. She stayed behind me 10 feet or so, and I wondered
if I had made a mistake. She kept falling back a bit and never caught
up to me, though, and when I reached the last .10 of a mile, I knew
there was no one behind me near. I couldn't hear footsteps.
But there was someone close by, as I could hear the people congratulating someone behind me a little ways. I ran in hard the
rest of the way—I wasn't going to let ANYONE catch me. I ran in
and everyone was so excited. There was a guy in a tux at the end
who gave me a bouquet. The hardware is a plaque that is awesome.
I didn't PR, but I don't care. That wasn't the point. I won and that is all that I was going for.

Official Results:
1/145
19:15
And I beat that cocky girl, and
that's what feels best!

Splits:
6:15:43
6:15:28
6:08:47
:36

Go Girl Run! 5k tomorrow.

2007-09-02T21:40:00.000-05:00

I don't know if I have ever been this nervous about a 5K!
Tomorrow morning at 8:00 am I am running in a 5K called the "Go Girl
Run!" 5K. It's all girls, and while I have run countless 5K's
in my 10 years of running, this one is going to be different.

Normally when one runs these competitive races, the entry fee
collected goes to different charities or organizations, or what have you.
So yeah, the one I'm doing in the morning? It's the 10th Annual
Go Girl Run! 5K, put on by one Uta Halee Girls Village.

So, for those of you who don't know, which may nearly be everyone,
Uta Halee is the part of the company that Phillip works for.

AAAAAAHHHH!

I am so super-nervous. He has already sent out a mass email to
everyone there saying that they should go and support the race,
and that I'm going to win it. I am pretty sure I will be able to
win it, based on my past performance with 5K's, and based on
the 2006 results for this same race. Last year the girl who won
was 30 years old, and her time was 19:31. The last 5K I ran,
back on June 9th, I won with a time of 19:06, and the last time
I checked I was only 29. Plus, of course my in-laws are going to
be there.

I know I can do it, but damn, my nerves are about to come undone!

Official Results.

2007-08-28T11:00:00.001-05:00

Okay, here are the official results.

Enjoy!

Results, though unofficial. That will come soon...

2007-08-25T22:10:00.005-05:00

Ok, so I'm tired of waiting on the race results to come online.
I was going to wait and give you guys the official time and
number of entrants and so forth, but I'm ready to give my report. I'm EXCITED!!!

Well, the day started out absolutely fantastic. The temperature
was perfect--temps were in the lower 60s, like 60 or 61, no wind,
and the humidity was high, but not relevant. The race took place on a running/biking trail we have here in Omaha. It's called the Keystone Trail, and it's pretty much flat, with a couple of rolling hills.

Overall it was an easy run for me. I don't know why, but for the
first 4 miles I felt like I was just running another training run, like
I was out there running my usual 7:53 minute miles. Haha, not
quite.

I was at the front of the pack from the gunshot. That's one of
the two or three times I've actually started that close to the front. When we started there were only about, oh, 10 guys with me, and one girl. The girl fell back almost immediately, and I ended up running with these guys for the first mile of the race. It was deathly quiet; I found out that none of the people that far in the front of the
pack make any noise running . I started to pass a couple of guys after the first mile or two, and I was doing it with ease and feeling great!!! I mean this was after going to eat Mexican food last night for dinner, which I thought for sure was going to end up biting me in the as$. And although it wasn't a problem during the race, I'm still feeling it now

So, anyway, at around mile 2 I passed a guy who said, "Okay, here
we go." Never saw him again, but what did that mean? I don't know.
Then at mile 3 I started closing in on another guy, but I didn't want
to take over too quickly. I wanted to make sure I was still feeling
powerful enough to actually gain some ground, as this guy was a
runner I'd seen in the last couple of 10K's I'd run in, and one of those times he actually came back and shot ahead of me. Feeling fine, I was planning to pass him at the turnaround, which was at
5K. I got up behind him, gave him some distance, and he says, after about 30 seconds, "Well, if you're going to pass me, pass me." He had been turning his head and glancing at me the entire time I was behind him. I thought, well, okay, I don't want to make him mad or worse, so I ran on past him.

I felt great at this point--came up on on the turnaround point and
took it with ease. I started on my way back, past 15 to 20 guys right
away, and most of them said "great job" or "way to go!" It was nice
because I've never had that before—very encouraging. I heard the
same from the majority of the runners the entire way back, which helped tremendously, I believe, in my motivation. Even people that weren't in the race, people just on the trail walking or running, said
the same (I had seen them the first time around).

I reached mile 4 and realized I was starting to breathe a little heavier, but not too bad. Unfortunately, however, I had forgotten to hit the split on my watch for the third mile. So, as of now, I only know the first two miles, and the fourth mile. I don't have the fifth either, as there was no mile marker for the fifth mile. So here's what I have for miles 1, 2, and 4:

6:54
13:46
--
27:41
--
--

There was a 1-mile remembrance walk that was to start a bit after the 10K, so while all of us were running in, there were walkers from
the walk coming in on the same path—like 20 or so walkers, all in
my way as I rounded the end of the path to run in. Probably the last
.10 of a mile there were walkers all along the path. It did not make
for good racing, believe me. I thought I was going to run into them.
It really sucked.

As for the official time, I don't know what it is. However, my father-
in-law did record it on his camera, and while I can't see the time-clock clearly, I think it says 41:46.

So, in other words, I PR'ed!!! This was supposed to be a training run, one that I would do as a bit of fun for my week of lower mileage.

I NEVER expected this.

My last three races have been 10K's. The results are as follows:
June 24, 2007 – 44:05
August 5, 2007 – 43:38
August 25, 2007 – 41:46 (unofficial)

Turns out I was also Overall Woman, First in my Age Group,
and 6th finisher overall. I don't know how many entrants there
were, like I said, I'll have to post that information later. I'm
guessing there were probably 50? 75? entrants.

Overall, a very good race. I'm so excited about the Omaha
marathon, now. Can't wait to give that report…

Ted E. Bear Hollow 10k

2007-08-25T06:59:00.001-05:00

In case anyone cares to note, I have a 10K this morning.
It's called the Ted E. Bear Hollow 10K.

AND, I have only 29 days until the marathon.
I've been training pretty hard. The last few weeks
have consisted of lots of running, LOTS, and the
past three Saturdays I've run 20, 22, and 24 miles,
consecutively. Over the past few weeks, during the
week, I've put in some 15, 17, and 18-milers. It's
been fun, but I'm ready for this marathon now!

Anyway, report in a bit-

For Fun...

2005-06-04T01:07:00.000-05:00

Thanks to someone else's blog:

TWELVE FAVORITE MOVIES (in no particular order)

Great Expectations
French Kiss
Amelie
LOTR (all 3)
The Aviator
The Interview with the Vampire
Beauty and the Beast
Meet Joe Black
Tripletts of Belleville
Sense and Sensibility
Aladdin
The Great Gatsby

ELEVEN FAVORITE BANDS/ARTISTS (in no particular order)

Smashing Pumpkins
Tool
A Perfect Circle
Bright Eyes
Death Cab for Cutie
Postal Service
The Cure
Garbage
Fiona Apple
Keane
Snow Patrol

TEN THINGS ABOUT YOU

I love RUNNING
I have a BBA in Accounting
I have a MS in Finance/Economics
I am going back to school to get a Master's in English
I am not married
I am 26, almost 27 in September.
I have no kids.
I have had only 1 pedicure and 1 manicure in my life.
Smile & laugh a lot
Love to write
Love my Mac
Love snow!
Blue eyes
Brown hair

NINE PEOPLE YOU ADMIRE (in no particular order)

Mom
Dad
Grandpa
Grandma
Sandy
Jennifer
Frank
Lynn Trusse
Reese Witherspoon

EIGHT FAVORITE FOODS/DRINKS

Diet Mountain Dew
Apples
Ice cream
Sandwiches
Canadian Bacon and Mushroom Pizza w/no cheese
Pretzels
Fat free pringles
Olive Garden

SEVEN THINGS YOU WEAR DAILY

Contacts
Clothes
Neutrogena Lip Moisturizer
Lotion
Mascara
Watch
Deodorant

SIX THINGS THAT YOU HATE

Rudeness
Negativity
Laziness
Poverty
Irresponsibility
Smoking

FIVE THINGS YOU DO DAILY

Shower
Check my e-mail
Check my snail mail
Worry
Think about running

FOUR SHOWS YOU WATCH

Lost
Good Morning America
Days of our Lives
Scrubs

THREE JOBS YOU'VE HAD

Customer Service
Accountant
Secretary

TWO THINGS YOU WANT
A husband.
Contentment.

ONE PERSON YOU WANT TO SEE RIGHT NOW

Anyone who will give me a hug.

Long day

2005-06-01T23:55:00.000-05:00

Whew!! What a long day.

I woke up at 8.
I went to class. That was....different. Haha!
I got out of class an hour early.
I went to the computer lab and printed out some stuff from my online class.
I went to eat something real fast.
I went to get my new ID card.
I talked to a couple of girls in the same situation I'm in. That's right: already have a business degree, going back to school to get an English degree.
I went to class and got learned. heehee
I went to my parents' house to talk to my mom for about 30 min.
I went to my house to change.
I went to the gym and ran for an hour and a half.
I talked to a guy while running, for an hour.
I went home and changed.
I went to the store and got something to eat.
I went to my parents' house to visit and stay with my mom. (my dad has some business meetings this week and will be home late the next 3 nights)
I ate some dinner.
I did some homework.
I went and got gas for tomorrow.
I finished homework.
I'm now typing this and watching Jimmy Kimmel....

Wow. Long day.

Birthday

2005-05-30T22:41:00.000-05:00

This is interesting...I found it on another person's website, and decided to make it my own.

Your Birthdate: September 21

Being born on the 21st day of the month (3 energy) is likely to add a good bit of vitality to your life.

The energy of 3 allows you bounce back rapidly from setbacks, physical or mental.

There is a restlessness in your nature, but you seem to be able to portray an easygoing, "couldn't care less" attitude.

You have a natural ability to express yourself in public, and you always make a very good impression.

Good with words, you excel in writing, speaking, and possibly singing.

You are energetic and always a good conversationalist.

You have a keen imagination, but you tend to scatter your energies and become involved with too may superficial matters.

Your mind is practical and rational despite this tendency to jump about.

You are affectionate and loving, but very sensitive.

You are subject to rapid ups and downs.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Cold

2005-05-29T21:12:00.000-05:00

outside, it is. I have just ran 24.31 in the past 2 days, and it's no wonder. With parents like mine, anyone would do something to keep their mind off their daily life.

Today I got up about 12:30 and went to get a storage unit. I made it to the gym by 2:15, and I finished around 4:15. I went to get my parents and brother to take the top off of my jeep. Just after, we went back to their house. I'd say it was about 6:45, we were sitting around talking at their house. My sister was there, bitch, and she asked my Dad if her insurance covered dental. He said no. My mom must have then remembered something she had needed to ask him about the insurance, because she said, "I still haven't gotten something back from the insurance on that blah blah blah...." I realized then that, yes, they WERE paying for my sister's insurance. I said at this time, "You are paying for her insurance?" My mom looked at me with a guilty as sin face and said "Yes, it's all included in our policy or whatever."

At this point, I just walked out of there. I can't deal with the fact that my sister is 23 years old, still lives at home, works as a waitress, dropped out of college, and still gets whatever she wants from my parents. She doesn't even have to ask for it. They just assume she needs it because she is so damn irresponsible.

I don't know how many people realize that I'm going back to school to get a different degree, but during this time I will not be working. I have had to take out a loan and get new medical insurance. I have insurance through my employer now, but that will be nonexistent after May 31st.

So after I found out they are paying for her insurance as well as everything else in the world for her, I just decided I'd had enough and left.

I came home and showered after a long day of running and taking the top off the jeep, and decided to go back over. We were supposed to cook out for memorial day. Lo and behold, I go back over, and they had already cooked and eaten. I was so pissed I just left. I will not be going back.

And now it's about 68 degrees outside, about to rain, and my jeep still has no top on. My brother was going to help me put the soft top on when I went over for dinner.

In my opinion, this whole day has just been COLD.

Blue

2005-05-27T23:34:00.000-05:00

I know, I know, it's been a couple of days since the last post. A lot has gone on.

My brother graduated from high school.
My loan check came in for school.
My boss has been sick for 2 days with some sort of...virus.

There is some other random stuff, most of which I can't remember.

David is apparently way past over me. No mention whatsoever lately of coming over, or vice versa. I'm becoming quite lonely, and that's very odd for me. I tend to be a BIGTIME loner.

I'm nervous. Only 1 more day of work, and then I start school. That's right. June 1st it will be school time, all the time. Scary, considering the amount of time I've been out (only a year, but still.)

I feel bad, I have been to the gym only once this week. I will be going both Saturday and Sunday. I'm really not in that much of a typing mood. I don't know why I decided to do it now. Bad idea, it seems. I think I'm just in a bad mood from talking to David and realizing the feelings he no longer has for me...oh well.

What can you do?

Weirdness

2005-05-25T22:53:00.000-05:00

Ok today was a weird one. I not only left work at noon, but I called and got an appointment with the allergy doctor on June 8th. See, I have this really bad problem with allergies in my eyes now, after not having them all my life. I really don't understand it. I've never had allergies, ever, and now I get them so bad I can't wear my contacts half the time. It has gotten really bad in the last 2-3 years.

Also, I went to Best Buy and picked up some new headphones when I left work. I didn't get to the gym (a plus to being off early) until 2, and I ran for a good 11.5 miles. Afterwards, I went to the parentals' house, and talked to my mom for about an hour.

When I came home, I got ready for the season finale of LOST!! which was 2 hours long. It was awesome, but disappointing. It did not reveal anything new or exciting, just gave us more to worry about, in my opinion.

I decided, since I have not been able to blog on Safari (the browser that comes standard to a Mac), that I would try to do it on the Foxfire browser. It seems to work on most everything. It worked, and here I am, blogging with all the options now available right there. Normally, I can blog ok, I just can't do anything extra, so to speak. Now with the Foxfire, it's available. Weirdness...

Motorcycle.

2005-05-24T22:22:00.000-05:00

Well, I just got home from riding on the motorcycle with David. We drove around the city for about an hour and 15 minutes. He showed me his new office he's moving into on Monday.

When I got home, I saw that my parents had called. I had called them earlier, and they were rude. So I debated on calling back. I did go ahead and call, and while I was talking to my Mom, David called on my cellphone. I listened to his message and he said that Frank was having a party to celebrate his #1 status for Where's Georgeing in Texas. I decided not to go, being it was already 10:00. 95% of the people going to the thing have no real job commitment, so I'll let them celebrate with him...

I did find out where Rene happened to be today. She went down to WT to check on some classes for this summer. I didn't know she was doing this, but it's ok. I think she mentioned it to her Dad, and that's enough for me.

Venting

2005-05-24T09:52:00.000-05:00

Well, I am at work. It's 9:50 in the a.m. and still no word from Rene on whether she's coming into work or not. This wouldn't be a big deal, ok yes it would, if she hadn't done it like 4 times since January!! What the fuck!

Anyway, so now that I am on my last week at work, she feels like she needs to get one more day of skipping in before I leave.

I mean, does her Dad owning the firm give her the right to be absent whever she feels compelled? No. Besides her being gone for the 5th time since January, I haven't even heard from her! Total disrespect. No respect for anyone but herself.

She had told me once that her sister is too self-involved. I think that's the common factor in the whole family. I don't know.

Busy as a bee

2005-05-23T22:16:00.000-05:00

I have a busy week coming up. I have to run on Tuesday and Wednesday night. This is because on Thursday night my brother graduates from high school. :(

On Friday I am going to eat with my boss's wife and Rene (coworker), for my last day of work. We are drinking, and I picked Olive Garden. Should be yummy!

I will then run on Saturday and Sunday, and on Monday get new tires and take the top off my jeep FINALLY.

Should be a busy week, and I'm pumped!

Quiz

2005-05-22T22:43:00.000-05:00

Great weekend! I ran both Saturday and Sunday, and cooked for my parents Sunday night. I cooked them Pasta Primavera, and included Vanilla Wafer Banana Pudding for dessert. They loved it. :)

I have a quiz I want to put on here, so I can see if anyone looks at this thing...

QUIZ

3 names you go by
1. Tonya
2. Hey
3. Tonya D'Lynn!

3 screen names you have had
1. tonya921
2. lucky921
3. liferunner921

3 physical things you like about yourself
1. eyes
2. hair
3. feet

3 physical things you don't like about yourself
1. my butt
2. my legs
3. my shoulders

3 parts of your heritage
1. German
2. Swiss
3. Texan

3 things you are wearing right now
1. pajamas
2. glasses
3. hair rubberband

3 Favorite bands/Musical artists
1. Bright Eyes
2. Death Cab for Cutie
3. Tool/A Perfect Circle

3 favorite songs
1. She has no time - Keane
2. Take It Easy - Bright Eyes
3. Judith - A Perfect Circle

3 things you want in a relationship
1. Trust
2. Honesty
3. Romance

3 physical things about the preferred sex that appeal to you
1. dark features
2. bad boy look/appeal, but the nice guy actuality
3. taller than myself

3 of your favorite hobbies
1. running
2. music
3. writing

3 things you want to do really badly right now
1. go to the store to get some ice cream
2. talk to my mom
3. sleep

3 things that scare you
1. getting fat
2. the dark
3. insects

3 of your everday essentials
1. shampoo & conditioner
2. diet mountain dew
3. apples

3 careers you have considered/are considering
1. Teacher/Writer
2. Modeling
3. Nutritionist

3 places you want to go on vacation
1. Switzerland
2. New York
3. Massachusetts

3 kids names you like
1. Aiden
2. Emma
3. Braden

3 things you wanna do before you die
1. Travel
2. Have a house
3. learn to play a musical instrument

3 ways you are stereotypically a boy
1. I love jeeps
2. I check out every every girl & compare
3. I don't listen

3 ways you are stereotypically a chick
1. I really love to shop
2. I love to have clean hair
3. I drive really bad

3 celeb crushes
1. Johnny Depp
2. Hugh Grant
3. Ian Sommerhall

3 people I would like to see take this quiz now
1. You
2. You
3. and You

Star Wars

2005-05-19T23:36:00.000-05:00

When asking a friend of mine, David, about Star Wars. He went to see it at 4 today.

phreakboyD (7:22:15 PM): whats up
tonya921 (7:22:53 PM): hey
tonya921 (7:22:55 PM): how was it
phreakboyD (7:23:25 PM): pretty good
tonya921 (7:24:17 PM): just pretty good
tonya921 (7:24:23 PM): not excellent?
phreakboyD (7:24:38 PM): just pretty good
phreakboyD (7:25:06 PM): better than the first two
tonya921 (7:27:39 PM): oh

So, there you have it folks. Straight from the viewer's mouth. Er, keyboard.

The Circle

2005-05-19T09:25:00.000-05:00

I now remember why I like running to A Perfect Circle.

It's perfect for running! It has the perfect beat, and there is a bit of liveliness just when I need it. It has very low- toned songs, with hardly any variance throughout the cd. It puts me in a sort of depressed mood, which is what I guess I need to run a really nice, steady run. The cd exudes steadiness, I guess.

In other words, I had an excellent run last night people. It was all I needed to make my night. I can't get over how little it takes to satisfy me...

Quirks

2005-05-18T11:44:00.000-05:00

OH MY GOD! As yet another car sits out in front of my office, bass blasting, I know more than ever that quitting this job and getting my degree in English is the way to go.

My office is in a bad part of town. Odd, since I work for a CPA who does oil and gas taxes for some of the richest people in Amarillo.

He also smokes in the office; another reason why I'm quitting.

Don't get me wrong--I would NOT try to impinge on another person's rights, ever.

But there is something to be said about someone who smokes in their office, and when an employee knocks on the door to go into their office and speak to them, they throw their cigarette in the desk drawer. Two things to be noted here:

1. Yes, my boss keeps his door shut. He's an introvert, which I respect highly, based on my own relativeness.

2. Is the fact that he smokes cumbersome for himself?

Who knows. All I know is that after 8 more days, I will no longer be working here. I will be off learning new literature and grammar. Having lack of more poignant things to say as of late, I feel I need to go back to what I believe I was meant to do. Back to what I would be doing, had I not got the strange idea of thinking I had a half of a clue about accounting.

Diversity

2005-05-15T00:46:00.000-05:00

Well, today...that was interesting...I went to 2 different parties for friends of mine that I haven't seen in ages. One of them, Justin, I haven't seen in, holy hell! like, 6 months or longer. I will tell you about them.

First of all, I didn't even wake up until like nearly 12:30 today. I received some much needed sleep last night, I can tell you that much. Then, after waking myself up, I finally went to the gym to run and such. (3rd day this week yay! Only one more day to go) I came home and showered, and was headed over to my parents' house for some lounging. I remembered a friend of mine, JoAnn, had left me a message at 9:45 this morning to tell me they were having a party for her son's birthday starting at 6. I thought about going, but decided just to go ahead to my parents' house and see what they were up to. I went all the way over there, and they weren't even there!! Soooooo I called up JoAnn and decided to run by there and see what was up. I ended up drinking a couple of beers, and stayed until about 8. I left then, and was on my way home, and I thought of calling my friend Justin to see what he was up to. He calls ALL THE TIME, and I never hang out with him, so I thought I'd surprise him. Boy did I ever. He told me to stop by, that his neighbor had a birthday party going on and there were some people over. I stopped by, and it was a great time...

I met the birthday girl, who was dressed in a white tank top and a flowered white and blue paisley skirt. Under it all, she had cowboy boots on. Don't ask me what that was all about, I don't know. Her fiancee was there; he was drunk, and was telling me about his business with his dad as pecan farmers in Portales, NM. Interesting. I met Justin's friend Michael, who looked identical to Jason Biggs...He was cute! But, he was only 20. He is from Norman, OK and going to school at WT next semester for Engineering. Another girl I met was Joy; she works in the Phillips plant in Borger. She is not only Catholic, but she goes to St. Thomas, the same church I sometimes attend. She was really pretty. She was 31, and was hooking up with some guy there who was also 31. Odd. There were many more people, none of whom I found out their names. It was very interesting, to say the least. Oh and one more thing, Justin's neighbor was from Wisconsin, so that was really cool, also. I never knew we had such diversity in this little town. I had a great time, and I left around midnight. Everyone else left, also. I came home, and now I am going to go over to David's house. He has invited me to come over and hang out, haha. At this hour of near 1:00 am. Oh well, nice day. Gym tomorrow...

The Latest

2005-05-13T09:02:00.000-05:00

Well, here it is Friday the 13th. I have not posted in days, mostly becauseI've been thoroughly busy. I have had a lot of work to do at my office, and for Mother's Day I was gone all day to Nazareth. That great town of a mere 300 people. I like visiting, but it's no place to live.

I have not been running as much as I would like. Sunday, I didn't get to go to the gym because of the whole Mother's Day thing. I had planned to go, but I didn't want to drive to Nazareth, and unless I didn't want to go, I had to ride with my brother. I did not go to the gym Monday or Tuesday, just out of pure laziness. On Wednesday and Thursday, I did go. It was so nice, I can't understand why it's so hard to get my butt up there. I am going to make myself go on Saturday and Sunday. Today I think I will pass, as my legs are sore from the past 2 days.

David seems to be on some sort of hiatus from me. It is not fun, he rarely talks to me except if to tell me something has just happened. I used to hear from him regardless of whether or not he has anything really to say. He used to call me after work, or anytime that I wasn't near a computer, and he didn't know where I was. Also, he used to leave me messages when I was away from the computer, saying goodnight or whatever the case may be. Oh well. Just a guy for ya.

I have received my Promissory Note from Bank of America. I don't know about all this loan stuff. If I get this loan, I will be so worried about it I probably won't focus on my classes. I guess we'll see what happens. Dad is supposed to look over it before I sign it and sent it back.

I don't really have much going on outside of all that. I lead a pretty regular life. I wish I could do something worthwhile, and make myself feel like I have a reason for being. I guess it will come one day...who knows.

Bleed

2005-05-07T19:23:00.000-05:00

I am over at my parents' house right now, doing my laundry. I am extremely tired. I know why. I went to work yesterday, late, and after work I went to the gym to run, which was a sucky run. I then went home and refixed my hair in order to go to a Cinco de Mayo party, which also sucked. Let me say something about that before I continue on...

This party was the worst thing I've been to in a while. It was in the American Legion building downtown, which I had never been to before. I showed up at 10:30 or so, thinking it was going to be a good time. When I walked in the front door, I could tell immediately that this was not the most exciting place to be on a Friday night. The front room was well lit, with people milling around. People being around 20-25 count probably. In other words, not that many people were there, from what I could tell. There were folding tables around the room in a long rectangle. I'm guessing that there were silent auction items on these tables. I saw Theresa, JoAnn's sister in law, to my left, sitting at a table. I went and said hi to her, but she was busy. I turned around and David and Bendsley were headed my direction. I talked to them for a few minutes, about nothing really, and then walked over past the tables and said hello to Samantha. She was talking to some random man, and I didn't know who he was, so I looked around for JoAnn. I spotted her only a few feet away, talking to a cop. I walked over to her, and she looked at me, smiled, and said "Hello! I have not seen you in ages!" I said "I know!" and we hugged. Then, she introduced me to the cop, and we chatted for a bit, the three of us. When JoAnn mentioned for me to get a beer, that it was free, I obliged. I walked over to the window to ask for a beer from the girl there, and learned there was no Coors Light. They offered only Miller or Smirnoff. Not Vodka, those awful things they have out now that are an excuse for a sweet alcoholic beverage. I noticed they had the little 8 oz. cans of soda, and I asked for a Diet Coke. I turned around and David and Bendsley had walked over and we decided to watch people dancing. What I didn't know was that there was a dance going on in the next room. David said they had spotted a lot of cute girls. Ok. Let me stop right there.

I don't know why he told me that. I don't care to hear it, and he's never said that about any other place we've been to together. He has never mentioned when he sees girls he thinks are cute. I was upset. When we were standing there, watching the people in the next room dance, he and Bendsley were talking about all the girls that were there. I DON'T want to hear all that. He may not care about me anymore, but I get jealous when he talks like that. I'll cut to the chase. When we were leaving, he told JoAnn that if there were any cute girls that wanted his number, that she was to give it to them. Plus, all evening, when we were talking about various things, he was so rude. Just in every little thing he said. And one other thing, when a lady walked by once with her fat belly hanging out of her shirt, I made the comment that he should get with her. He just said, "No, I already have the lucky ladies picked out that I want." Seriously! Do you have to say that? UGGHHH.

Well, so when we left, I decided I needed to go get a baby shower gift bag for today for a friend of mine, Tiffany. I went to Walmart, and I guess they decided to go to Hummers, because the next thing I knew, I had a voicemail. I hadn't even heard my phone ring. But anyway, I checked my voicemail and he had said they were going there. I called him back and said, "I don't think I'm going to go. I am at Walmart getting a bag for Tiffany, and then I'm going home. I don't really want to go anyway because you were so rude tonight." All he said was, "Oh. I am sorry." So, that was that. I went home, when he got home, he chatted online with me for a few minutes, and then went to bed. I couldn't believe it. I saw him at the baby shower today, and I've talked to him a little on AIM, but other than that, I haven't really had the impression he wants to even talk to me. I guess he is really starting to get over me. I didn't think it would happen. But something has changed from when we were sleeping together every night. He is distant, all of a sudden.

SO. I guess I'll go on with why I'm tired. I woke up at 10, to get in the shower and go to the baby shower at 11. I left the shower at 1:30, and then went home for a while. I decided to finally go to the gym at 2:45, and got home at 5. When I got home, I left again, went to Walmart, went to the Pac A Sac to get beef jerky, and now I'm here at my parents' house, doing laundry. HAHA and David just messaged me. I guess he's home from his parents' house.

Well, I'll leave on that note. I just wanted to be the love of his life forever, I guess. Guess that's not going to happen...

What you've found sure upsets you
Never saw it coming did you?
Its easy to be suprised with both your eyes sewn closed
Handled with great percision, another thoughtless execution
You're the subject of this exhibition
A willing cadaver, a willing cadaver.
Scalpel, sutured.
Made whole again.

These cuts are leaving creases
Trace the scars, fit the peices
Tell your story, you don't need to say a word.
Call off the calvary, can't save a wretch like me.
Clean this with kerosene.
If you can't leave it be might as well make it bleed.
Scalpel, sutured.
Made whole again.

Your wires are frayed, can't fire right
You look better when out of sight
You were not made to stand and fight
There's something better wrong with you

Your wires are frayed, can't fire right
You look better when out of sight
You were not made to fire right
There's something better wrong with you

Your pulse is anemic, you're tired of the fire
You're bruising too easy and falling behind
And no one is waiting for you.
And no one is waiting for you.
And no one is waiting for you.

Call off your quarantine, can't save the rest from me
Clean this with kerosene.
If you can't leave it be might as well make it bleed.
Scapel, Sutured.
Made whole again.

Your wires are frayed, can't fire right
You look better when out of sight
You were not made to stand and fight
There's something better wrong with you

If You Can't Leave it Be, Might As Well Make it Bleed~Dashboard Confessional

Bank of Frank

2005-05-06T09:32:00.000-05:00

Well, this day could not have started off any worse. Actually, it started last night. I was trying to transfer all my files from the old laptop to the iBook, and it ended up taking 3 hours.

Nothing to be concerned about, so why am I complaining?

I had gone to my parents' house to tell them about my school going's on, and I ended up doing the transfer there, because I had given my brother my old laptop. I had to end up leaving the iBook there....Sad. I only had it one day, and already I had to leave it somewhere other than my house. My Mom said,
"It's not your child."

Well, ok. So not only did I have to go to bed last night with no computer, I woke up this morning and could not check my email. I guess I knew this and was not very excited about getting up, because I woke up at 7:15. UGGGGHHHH. I was 30 minutes late to work, but I called my boss and told him I had a flat. He was fine with that. Since I am leaving the job June 1st anyway, I don't think he really cares too much.

So now I'm at work, not working (hehe) and I guess I'll go to my parents' house for lunch and pick up the iBook. I hope that sister I have didn't mess with it when she got home at all hours of the night.

I have been thinking about how much I miss hanging out with my friend Frank. I went to Virginia with him in November of last year and I had a great time. Anyway, he has a girlfriend now, and I hardly get to see or talk to him. I have left a link to his website, which consists of the greatest thing I could ever imagine doing with so much time on my hands...

School, as it seems.

2005-05-05T16:35:00.000-05:00

Well, I have received the Mac. It is every bit as awesome as I thought it would be. It is much more sophisticated than a PC, and it is taking a while for me to figure it all out. I'm getting it down though.

On a different note, I have been so stressed out the past few weeks, I have really not done much at work. (Note the present time.) I found out today that I have received the loan I needed to live during the process of going back to grad school. That's right, going back to get the second Master's degree in my life. Even though I have a Bachelor's in Accounting and a Master's in Economics/Finance, I feel as though it is not my calling to work in the business industry. I think the reason I put myself through the hell I did acquiring the 2 former degrees has been solely on the recommendations of my Dad.

My Dad. He is my hero, always has been. He has done so much with his life, despite not going to college. I have always listened to his advice before anyone else can get a word in. I don't know why. I guess everyone has someone like that....

I am now finished registering for classes, applying for loans (although, I have seen nothing in the way of monetary funds at this time), and purchasing the new computer I so desparately needed. Now I just have to get prepared to start studying and doing homework again. I hate tests. But now is not the time to be worried about that.

The only thing I have left to do, it seems, is buy my books. *sigh*

Well, more later. I just wanted to get some of that stuff out, and leave you with the link.

Splintering

2005-05-03T23:45:00.000-05:00

Ok, first off, no Mac. :( Sadness ensues.

Second, I was at the grocery store earlier today, and when I was walking out, a book caught my eye. It was a book by a girl who LOVES Sylvia Plath, whom I think is a great poet. Everyone should Google her if you get the time, and are interested in great writing.

And last, but definitely not least, I got my brother out of the house tonight.

We went to Barnes and Noble to read for awhile, and it was good for him, I think. He revealed something to me right before we made our way out to the B&N. He told me that Dad had arrived, and that he hated when Dad was home because there was a greater chance he'd be griped out. I just don't think that is healthy for someone living at home with their parents. I mean, I know that kids hate their parents and blah blah blah, but he isn't the type to say something unless he means it. He takes things in stride, and doesn't worry about anything. So I'm thinking this has to be a true, genuine feeling of contempt. I hope I'm wrong. Either way, I love them both.

The Mac

2005-05-03T11:33:00.000-05:00

Well, today should be the day. We'll see if it comes at the stated arrival time of either 10:30 am, or 4:00 pm. Either way, it should be today.. The Mac

The Curse

2005-05-02T23:18:00.000-05:00

Oh my gosh. I am about to watch Conor Oberst pour his heart out on national tv. I know I am a dork, but my god that boy can sing. I have always loved the dark, dreary boys, I can't help it. I tend to be the depressed type.

On a different note, I have been laying here talking to my brother on AIM, finding out what I thought was unfortunately true. He is more like me than I thought. He has become what I have always been: a loner. I feel bad for him. He needs more in his life. He was telling me that a girl commented to him on his blog, asking him who he hangs out with at school. He asked me what to say.

Me: I don't know, I don't go to school with you. I don't know who you hang around.
Him: I don't hang around anyone at school. I talk to people in class, but I don't really hang around anyone.
Me: Well tell her you hang out with Dan.
Him: I only talk to Dan every once in awhile, I don't really hang out with him.
Me: Well, I don't know.
Him: I really don't have any friends at school.

What do you say to that? I tried to tell him I was the same way in high school, and that college will be better. But will it? Was it for me? NO. I have friends now, very select friends, that I hang out with whenever I feel the need. But I don't have anyone I really trust, or with whom I'm really close friends. Oh, what a curse...

Secrets

2005-05-02T19:49:00.000-05:00

Today as I was sitting at my desk at the office, minding my own business, Rene yells at me that she is sending me an email.

It says a lot about secrets. After reading everyone's terrors, nightmares, dreams and addictions, I decided to post a little secret of my own. I may even send it in. Who knows.

A few days ago, I received an email from my elementary school years. Jessica Sorenson, who is now known as Jessica Murphy, sent a few of us alumni an email. It was nice to hear from her, but why now? Anyway, she has 2 kids, and is living in Germany with her husband. I don't think I will ever get married. Not that I will avoid the marriage vows intentionally. No. I just don't have the attention span, nor the dedication. I am so selfish it hurts. I've become too independent to allow anyone into my life anymore.